A Series of Saucy Limericks

CJBurgandy · Post by **CJBurgandy** » Tue May 25, 2004 10:20 am

woohoo! all night gaming party at Misca's house.

the nice thing is that everyone is a winner.....

It's a new craze among the lez
best thing since the vibe pez
place it on your crotch
let it buzz your notch
3 cheers for the new game "Rez"

RantinAn · Post by **RantinAn** » Tue May 25, 2004 3:58 pm

Goddessmisca wrote:"You know those things called "gamer girls" yes we exist, and I am one of them. If you could kindly stop worring about your erection and pick up that controller so I can whip your ass I'd appreciate it."

you know i JUST noticed that sig....

the was a young lady called misca
your ass she could definatly kicksa
street figther or doom,
she can clear the room
but rez makes her all wet and slicksa

hehehe.... i think i'm falling in lust.

Goddessmisca · Post by **Goddessmisca** » Tue May 25, 2004 5:39 pm

RantinAn wrote: you know i JUST noticed that sig....

Heee that’s cause the sig is new ^_^ I was sitting in my living room, in low cut jeans and a bra playing some Soul Calibur 2, and one of my brothers newer friends (whose never met me) wandered into the house looking for him and made comments as to his astonishment at how a GIRL was playing that game, it amused me so much I thought I should use it as my sig.

And I love the limerick, it makes me feel special!

Honor · Post by **Honor** » Wed May 26, 2004 1:44 pm

Found a few I had to relate:

My love, in a rare pious mood
Shaved her pubes,and then had it tattooed
Now, while I'm down south
Making love with my mouth
My nose rubs the arse of St. Jude!

*****

There once was a girl from Brewster
Whose ass was so fine that I goosed her
But her panties were thin
and my finger slipped in
And now it don't smell like it us'ter.

*****

You couldn

RantinAn · Post by **RantinAn** » Wed May 26, 2004 4:06 pm

*giggles uncontrolably* Honor, those are damned good!

Mad Irishman · Post by **Mad Irishman** » Wed May 26, 2004 7:38 pm

A cuple of those are in my book, although I really like the first and last ones!

____________________

A Salvation lassie named Claire
Was having her first love affair.
As she climbed into bed
She reverently said,
'I wish to be opened with prayer."

A certain young sheik I'm not namin'
Asked a flapper he thought he was tamin'
"Have you still got your middenhead?"
"Don't be foolish," She said,
"But I still have the box that it came in!"

CJBurgandy · Post by **CJBurgandy** » Thu May 27, 2004 12:20 am

Mad Irishman wrote: A Salvation lassie named Claire

And the reason people call me CJ is because Claire rhymes with 52 words.

Honor · Post by **Honor** » Thu May 27, 2004 2:50 am

Another old favorite that just came to mind...

On the sheets of a hooker named Gail,
was embroidered the price of her tail.
And on her behind,
for the sake of the blind,
was the same information, in braille!

Mad Irishman · Post by **Mad Irishman** » Thu May 27, 2004 6:11 pm

cjburgandy wrote: And the reason people call me CJ is because Claire rhymes with 52 words.

Yeah, I found that in my book and couldn't resist!

Kite-san · Post by **Kite-san** » Thu May 27, 2004 8:59 pm

i hope this one is enjoyed by others as much as me.

there once was a girl who with tenticles,
tended to get experimenticle
with them she did play,
all throught nights and through days,
'til her scores became ever nonsensical!

CottonStar · Post by **CottonStar** » Fri May 28, 2004 3:57 pm

Experimentical = the greatest non-existing word EVER.

Mad Irishman · Post by **Mad Irishman** » Sat May 29, 2004 1:01 am

Ok:The correct version of the songs chorus (You may know it) goes:

When I think of rain, I think of singing,
When I think of singing it's a heavenly tune.
When I think of heaven I think of angels,
and when I think of angels I think about you!

I dedicate this version to all the men on this forum:

When I think of rain I think about mudpuddles,
When I think about mudpuddles I think about glue!
When I think of glue I think about horses,
and when I think of horses I can't help but think of you!

CottonStar · Post by **CottonStar** » Sat May 29, 2004 1:04 am

Hey, I know I'm ugly but that was uncalled for.

TMR · Post by **TMR** » Sat May 29, 2004 8:46 am

From deep 'neath the crypt at St. Giles
Came a shriek that re-echoed for miles
The vicar said "Gracious!
It's Brother Ignatius!
He's forgotten the bishop has piles!"

There once was a young man from Perth
The nastiest bastard on Earth
He sucked off hjis brother
and buggered his mother
and ate up the whole afterbirth.

Meet Elmer, young son of the Thorpes.
Afflicted with psychotic warps
His idea of fun
Is to bugger a nun
And then vomit all over the corpse.

Honor · Post by **Honor** » Tue Jun 01, 2004 9:20 am

.*O.O*.

And to think... When I first started posting here, I was hesitant to share:

There was an old sailor named Dave
Who kept a dead whore in a cave.
He said "I'll admit,
She does smell a bit...
But just thnk of the money I save!"

Nithos · Post by **Nithos** » Tue Jun 01, 2004 9:03 pm

There was a fan of Jack Chick
Tossed out for his rude shtick
He said patheticly
"Nobody Loves me"
Now Chick is with a chick with a dick

Mad Irishman · Post by **Mad Irishman** » Wed Jun 02, 2004 4:05 am

Ok.
Don't kill me after I say this,
I'll go back to poper limericks afterwards

When it rains I think of the ocean
When I think of the ocean I think of fish in the sea.
Amongst fish I think of the octapus,
And that brings my thoughts to Ghastly!

I love your comic.

"Now show Freddy smut!"

H-Kat · Post by **H-Kat** » Wed Jun 02, 2004 12:04 pm

I stick my log in your oven
I wait for....

Ah, fuck it, Ted Copple fucks ducks. In the ass.

-Kitty

Mad Irishman · Post by **Mad Irishman** » Fri Jun 04, 2004 4:59 am

There was a young fellow named Bliss
Whose sex-life was strangely amiss,
For even with Venus
His Recalcitrant penis
Could never do better than

T
H
I
S
.
.
..................................

That said:

There was an old spinster named Campell
Got tangled one day in a bramble.
She cried, "Ow, how it sticks!
But so many pricks
Are not met every day on a ramble....

And finally:

A young man whose sight was myopic
Thought sex an incredible topic.
So poor were his eyes,
That dispite his large size
His Penis apeared microscopic!!!

Honor · Post by **Honor** » Sun Jun 06, 2004 7:28 pm

A devotee of Christ we all know
was frightened to hell he would go
'twas his horror to find
that the shame in his mind
was well met with a tingling below.

As his lust burns in hell to it's embers
it's his hope that his prayers he remembers
but his shock's aren't quite done...
if he yields to Fred's 'fun',
He's due for a meeting o'the members.

Does he know what hir wishes might be
When s/he says "Bukake funtime! cum see!!"?
Will he utter aloud
quotes to make the Christ proud...?
"Suffer Freddy to cum <i>onto</i> me."