The Usual Suspects, Who is Dr.Why?

James Rayner 2 · Post by **James Rayner 2** » Thu Apr 04, 2002 11:41 pm

THIRD BASE!

Sorry, It had to be done.

First, We use process of elimination.

The Man seen http://www.faans.com/d/20000705.html

In this shot, Very bottom, Center, Commonly Referred to as Dagger Guy, or Slake.

Long Shiny Hair, Tall, Thin, Fits the profile Near perfectly.

Put him as Suspect # 1. His obsession With The Vampire game could easily have transferred over to Dr.Why Continunity, With access to a Possible friendship with Guthrie Carrol and Tim Mitts through Katherine, This has serious potential in the making.

Next we go on to one of the more obvious possiblities.

Miller, first seen with Sully
http://www.faans.com/d/20000512.html

Here.

Cross him off, Too obvious, Vampiric Nature, And Unless his opposite is working AGAINST THe FIB, Then he's Cooked as a possibility.

Next possiblity.

Thackerabilitus Sieughieweicz. I think I actually spelled that right. Wierd.

Seen here for the first time.

http://www.faans.com/d/20000202.html

Throw in Long Hair, Darken it, And You've got the Main man of Geekdom. It would also stand to reason why he is called "The Professor" by the General. The Time Travel device in a Calvin-esque cardboard box, The Disguise, The TIMING. All Thack Worthy in terms of sheer Genius. Suspect Number 2.

Next Suspect.

Alternate Universe Rumiko Tanaka.

Seen first, http://www.faans.com/d/20020111.html

Here. The Long dark hair, The Determination of a different place and time. This seems to be a popular Theory, which you can Simply stick into the DIRT.

Without Thack, and considering she was then being prosecuted, It doesnt seem likely she could get her hands on Time Technology. And considering her lack of devious ability, consider this Case closed, Next Subject.

Kev, AKA Caine III, AKA The Storyteller Guy.
Seen First, http://www.faans.com/d/20000629.html

Here.

He fits the Physical Profile, as well as seeming to be a very intelligent individual, Well enough connected, It stands to reason that He would be the only one with the costuming skills, the Fandom Knowledge, And The will to pull off such an insane stunt, puts him high on my list. on to the next suspect.

Shanna Cochran, Ace Reporter, First seen http://www.faans.com/d/20000103.html

Here.

Add hair Coloring, Take into account "It hurt my eyes", and add a dash of her already sizable knowledges, And there might be somthing to this Theory. Though not very likely, It would be like Shanna to Refer To Rumy as Tanaka, instead of as Rumy.

Next Subject.

Alisin Worthington, Goth girl and BDSM Queen, Seen first in real style http://www.faans.com/d/20000424.html

Here.

This is pretty hairbrained, It has potential, but is far from realistic. Scratch the card off folks.

That's it for now. Just thought I should lay down my $0.02 for posterity.

Shatteredtower · Post by **Shatteredtower** » Thu Apr 04, 2002 11:54 pm

Miller, first seen with Sully
http://www.faans.com/d/20000512.html

Here.

Cross him off, Too obvious, Vampiric Nature, And Unless his opposite is working AGAINST THe FIB, Then he's Cooked as a possibility.

As long as you're dealing with this universe's Miller, that's true. But since the General seems to jump dimensions as well as time, there is no reason to suspect that her "opposite number" does not.

It seems less improbable than Thack to me, somehow.

Ray Radlein · Post by **Ray Radlein** » Thu Apr 04, 2002 11:56 pm

The thing is, unless one of those folks also got a nose job, none of them match the physical profile of The Professor.

Some of them do resemble Gilligan, however.

James Rayner 2 · Post by **James Rayner 2** » Fri Apr 05, 2002 12:02 am

Ahh ha, But they dont NEED A nosejob.

We're assuming they're wearing full costume, yes? Who's to say the long nose is REAL?

It's been done, time and again, with noses to make them longer, or otherwise. It's not that difficult if someone who is SKILLED in it does it.

Say, a certain Will Erixon....

Bo Lindbergh · Post by **Bo Lindbergh** » Fri Apr 05, 2002 5:21 am

Without the wig and the spectacles, he looks a bit like Bruno the Bandit.

RalphP · Post by **RalphP** » Fri Apr 05, 2002 5:35 am

On 2002-04-05 05:21, Bo Lindbergh wrote:
Without the wig and the spectacles, he looks a bit like Bruno the Bandit.

So - it's not just me? I thought the same thing.

Of course, if he WERE BtB, there's be a little dragon flying nearby to keep him out of trouble ...

RwP
(who doesn't read BtB often, just once in a blue moon)

KingLeon · Post by **KingLeon** » Fri Apr 05, 2002 8:38 am

While Kev is interesting, wouldn't that mean he would have had to part with his precious goatee?
Or... he might have grown out of having it. Hmm.

James Rayner 2 · Post by **James Rayner 2** » Fri Apr 05, 2002 9:00 am

To save fandom,wouldnt YOU make a sacrafice or two?

Of course, he could have grown out of it.

Entirely possible.

=D

FrustratedPilot · Post by **FrustratedPilot** » Fri Apr 05, 2002 9:54 am

Or to quote Grandpa in <i>The Seven Samurai</i> "You worry about your beard when your neck is in the noose?"

Bushipunk · Post by **Bushipunk** » Fri Apr 05, 2002 10:11 pm

On 2002-04-05 09:54, FrustratedPilot wrote:
Or to quote Grandpa in <i>The Seven Samurai</i> "You worry about your beard when your neck is in the noose?"

How often do you get to use a quote like that? Figures that when an opportunity arises, someone would beat me to it...

It seems pretty well established now that The General is not an alternate version of any character, but possibly (indeed, likely) the descendant of one of the Fans (most likely Kath). Thus, it makes sense that The Professor, rather than being an alternate/future character, would be descended from one of them (thus aleviating the nose and gender problems, I think).

Bushi

Ray Radlein · Post by **Ray Radlein** » Fri Apr 05, 2002 10:51 pm

It seems pretty well established now that The General is not an alternate version of any character, but possibly (indeed, likely) the descendant of one of the Fans (most likely Kath). Thus, it makes sense that The Professor, rather than being an alternate/future character, would be descended from one of them (thus aleviating the nose and gender problems, I think).

As I think about it, I don't see any reason why The General or the Professor would need to be the descendant of any of the Fans. I don't think it actually adds anything to the story if they are, at least not so far.

Also, if the General is their descendant, then she is deliberately screwing around with her own ancestors. Why not go and shoot her own grandmother, while she's at it? Has she never read "A Sound of Thunder" (2213 edition, annotated)?

Wish · Post by **Wish** » Sat Apr 06, 2002 10:37 am

Yes, yes, all these attempts at identification are very droll, but you've all overlooked the obvious answer staring you in the face. Ladies and Gentlemen, it should be very clear that the Professor is actually: THE JUNIOR JUMBLER!!!

(dun dun DUUUUUUUUUUN!!)

After the tragic shooting death of his father by agents Miller and Sully, the Junior Jumbler plotted his revenge for years! Hidden beneath the streets of Atlanta in a long-forgotten MARTA station, he waited for the perfect moment to strike against the agents who caused him so much anguish!

However, his plans were overthrown when The General swept through the vampire Underground during her takeover and killed the former agents. Denied his revenge, the Junior Jumbler put all his efforts into pre-emptively destroying the General so she would never have a chance to thwart his evil scheme.

MWAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!

-Wish
Our life is one big pun.

KingLeon · Post by **KingLeon** » Sat Apr 06, 2002 9:30 pm

Who is the Junior Jumbler?

Ray Radlein · Post by **Ray Radlein** » Sun Apr 07, 2002 12:48 am

On 2002-04-06 21:30, KingLeon wrote:
Who is the Junior Jumbler?

I think wish was inventing the hypothetical offspring of this guy.

Wish · Post by **Wish** » Sun Apr 07, 2002 6:31 am

On 2002-04-07 00:48, Ray Radlein wrote:
On 2002-04-06 21:30, KingLeon wrote:
Who is the Junior Jumbler?
I think wish was inventing the hypothetical offspring of this guy.

Hun. Y'know, I WAS going to post a rather extensive history of the Junior Jumbler, but it appears that many of the posts which refer to him cannot be found by the phpBB database. I smell a conspiracy....

Sadly, I cannot take credit for the Junior Jumbler. He is a Tom the Fanboy creation, as far as I can figure (first mention I can actually get the board to cough up is here), although Blondlot has offered many theories about the Jr. Jumbler's methods and motivations as well. BUT, Ray, you are quite correct. The Junior Jumbler is the son (or is it brother?) of the Atlanta Scrabbler, the crossword covered man who ended up in the car of agents Sully and Miller during TMDG. (Which remains one of the more confusing scenes in all of Fans!, for me at least. What exactly goes ON here? How the devil did that guy get into their car? Sully, obviously startled says 'Eyes on the road!' as if there's something in their way, but then the Atlanta Scrabbler shows up IN THE BACK SEAT! Explain this to me, someone. (Divergent thought: Note the sly 'hint' about T. Campbell's later-released 'SEARCH' comic on the Atlanta Scrabbler's face.))

Anyway. There you have it. The history of the Junior Jumbler. Use this knowledge wisely, my sons.

-Wish
Who isn't really T. Not. At. All.