Poetry contest

ZOMBIE USER 4075 · Post by **ZOMBIE USER 4075** » Sun Mar 17, 2002 10:08 pm

As you may or may not know, this is finals week here at the University of Washington. And for poor Allan, as an electrical engineer, that means a lot of stress. For example, he's been working all day on making his lego robot. When he's done, it's supposed to play soccer. (By itself mind you, not remote controlled.) When I last saw it, it spastically ran around and bumped into walls.

So, to cheer him up (keep him from going insane(er)) I thought I should get him a corvette. But I haven't got any money. So how about a poetry contest instead?

Write a limerick, haiku, ode, sonnet or whatever about your favorite Umlaut House character. Or the author. Or characters from other comic strips. Or characters from other comic strips and characters from Umlaut House. Or...you get the idea.

The winner will recieve... Fame and Glory! (Except we're out of fame. And the glory's been in the back of the fridge for a long time.)

ZOMBIE USER 4075 · Post by **ZOMBIE USER 4075** » Sun Mar 17, 2002 10:11 pm

Here are mine:

There once was an electrical engineer,
For his lego 5killz there was no peer,
Building robots,
Drove him nuts,
Or maybe it was just the beer?

And here's another one:

There once was a guy who liked legos,
And he also liked waffles called Eggos,
He thought building robots,
Would drive him nuts...
AND IT DID.

[ This Message was edited by: Karlotta on 2002-03-17 22:15 ]

Hampster · Post by **Hampster** » Sun Mar 17, 2002 10:32 pm

There once was cartoonist Allan
who made his fans feel Valhallen (sp?)
I feel I've got the nack
I've had guinnus, KLB, and olde Jack
And I hope the next round he is bi'n.

[ This Message was edited by: hampster on 2002-03-17 22:33 ]

Alfador · Post by **Alfador** » Mon Mar 18, 2002 8:42 am

There was pervert fox, named Volair.
He'd try many ways to "make an heir."
But you know he'd "fly"
With girl OR with guy
So now Saundra'll punt him into the air.

When the Cal comes home
Something really expected
Volair smooches. Mad!

Saundra has bad luck.
Mistaken for lesbian.
Now she'll kill Volair.

TOS · Post by **TOS** » Mon Mar 18, 2002 5:00 pm

I now present another installment of the weird crap that runs through my brain. Ahem...

5killz ran round and fell again.
Why me? Why this? Pondered Allan.
I'll get this right,
What's my next move?
And then he slipped
Into his groove.

Now how to make this robot go?
AI! AI! But I must know,
To give it brains,
To make it think,
Will this just drive me
Right to drink?

Or will it give me what I need,
To bring this robot up to speed?
I'll try, I'll win,
I know I can,
Because I am
The NINJA man!

And so he set out with great speed,
To work upon this noble deed.
He gave it brains,
He gave it speech,
Would soccer still
Be out of reach?

"Can you play soccer?" Allan asked.
"I can." 5killz sat back and basked
In glory for
It was you see,
The smartest AI
To ever be.

"But will you play, and will you kick?"
"To do so just would make me sick."
"How trivial!"
"I hope you see,"
"To rule the world's"
"My destiny."

"I see how quickly you forget,"
"You're made from my old lego set."
"To take your limbs"
"From whence they lie"
"Would not be hard"
"For a human guy."

And so it went, 5killz did play,
And Allan passed on finals day.
Fame and fortune,
Find him well.
But what of 5killz?
"Please do tell!"

He's found a life out on his own.
He sits and answers telephone
Calls, you see
I here report,
He works at Microsoft
Tech Support.

Andrick · Post by **Andrick** » Mon Mar 18, 2002 5:49 pm

There was a young man without a clue
To write poetry he asked who knew
If there were any rules
For positions and tools
To describe who did what with who?

I'm serious here, 'tis no lie
Are there ratings for which we must aspire
Must we on clean humor and jokes rely
And limiting the sexual attire?

Allan_ecker · Post by **Allan_ecker** » Tue Mar 19, 2002 11:59 am

There once was a writer who vexed
his fans 'cause they were preplexed
over what they could say
in the forums by day
without having their posts getting X'ed.

But I say, "do not fear"
Rudeness is welcome here
but I think that you all should take note:

That what you say
Can come back someday
next to your name, a colon, and quotes.

(To put it more prosaicly, this board is self-cesored, meaning the only time I'll delete something for content is at the request of other readers, and then only if I agree there's a problem.)

Alfador · Post by **Alfador** » Tue Mar 19, 2002 5:02 pm

Without further ado, then, I speak
Permission given, from Allan, noble geek.
Of the current storyline, much do I think.
Fairest Saundra, where wilt thou drink?
Volair, Rick, and Jake, what do they do?
Is it things that make Saundra say "Eeeeewwww..."?
Shall Rick's lab conjure up more invention?
Will this head-on-legs contact another dimension?
What could possibly be his intention?
Perhaps, things, that we dare not even mention?

Guard thy thought, and thy speech, for one day
One may come up to you, who doth say:
"I entreat thee, good sir, get thy mind
Out of that gutter, 'tis crowding out mine."

Alfador · Post by **Alfador** » Tue Mar 19, 2002 5:04 pm

On 2002-03-18 08:42, Alfador wrote:
When the Cal comes home
Something really expected
Volair smooches. Mad!

So, nobody got the reference here? (hint: another forum Allan and I both frequent)

Allan_ecker · Post by **Allan_ecker** » Wed Mar 20, 2002 4:02 pm

Alfy, *I* don't get it.

Alfador · Post by **Alfador** » Wed Mar 20, 2002 5:31 pm

TCM. Fanfic. Something Unexpected. Something Really Unexpected. (The scene which has been in many fanfics since.)

TwoDifferentSox · Post by **TwoDifferentSox** » Thu Mar 21, 2002 1:25 am

Throw in more lupines on bikes, and then eveyone will get it.

The DeMontford campus seems to be really dangerous for pedestrians...

apologies to everyone that doesn't know TCM and so is clueless now about my senseless comment...