Graveyard poem

DJ Pirtu · Post by **DJ Pirtu** » Fri Apr 05, 2002 6:43 am

In a a cultural TV program in Finland called Valopilkku there was a introduction of a book. I don't remember its author or name, but I do remember a poem that it had. It was in Finnish (of course) so I'll try to tranlate it the best I can.

"Here lays a total asshole."
This text can be found in hardly any gravestone.
Though sometimes there would be a reason.

Makes you think, doesn't it?

<font size=-1>[ This Message was edited by: DJ Pirtu on 2002-04-05 06:44 ]</font>

Michael Ezaiany · Post by **Michael Ezaiany** » Fri Apr 05, 2002 8:08 am

Makes me wonder about what will they write on my gravestone.

Striker · Post by **Striker** » Fri Apr 05, 2002 8:15 am

Well, since I intend to live forever that won't be any problem for me

.

Michael Ezaiany · Post by **Michael Ezaiany** » Fri Apr 05, 2002 8:17 am

Forever? That a good idea. Say, when the worlds collide, will you be here to record it all on a camera?

Arcaton · Post by **Arcaton** » Fri Apr 05, 2002 8:29 am

"Halt, Friend as you pass by
As you are now, so once was I
As I am now so will you be....
Prepare your soul to follow me"
or from the song "Why Build A Wall Round A Graveyard?"(Leslie Sarony, I suspect)
"Here lies a Heavyweight under the ground
With a circular saw only lasted one round"
"Here's a contortionist, Filleted Pete
He tried his best to make both his ends meet"
"Here lies a Sailor, old Stoker Joe
He was stoking up here now he's stoking below"
Shovel on a little more coal!

Striker · Post by **Striker** » Fri Apr 05, 2002 8:49 am

On 2002-04-05 08:17, Michael Ezaiany wrote:
Forever? That a good idea. Say, when the worlds collide, will you be here to record it all on a camera?

Actually, that's precisely what I intend to do. I want to see, experience and record everything, all of creation. That's my personal dream

.

El SillY · Post by **El SillY** » Fri Apr 05, 2002 10:17 am

On 2002-04-05 08:49, Striker wrote:
On 2002-04-05 08:17, Michael Ezaiany wrote:
Forever? That a good idea. Say, when the worlds collide, will you be here to record it all on a camera?

Actually, that's precisely what I intend to do. I want to see, experience and record everything, all of creation. That's my personal dream .

I intend to join you.

Michael Ezaiany · Post by **Michael Ezaiany** » Fri Apr 05, 2002 10:20 am

I'd join you too, but I'm busy at the moment. Gotta plan a knife-slaughter with suicidal ending y'know...

Vazagi · Post by **Vazagi** » Fri Apr 05, 2002 10:47 am

Michael, use explosives instead. And try to make it so big that the astronauts aboard the international space station can see you

Michael Ezaiany · Post by **Michael Ezaiany** » Fri Apr 05, 2002 11:30 am

Nonono... knife is better. When you slaughter 20 people with a knife, you get the blood all over the room and yourself. That's the kind of serial murder I'm planning. I can't decide between this and my another plan which involves a gun and 17 bullets. 16 people and one for myself.

Striker · Post by **Striker** » Fri Apr 05, 2002 11:38 am

Nah. Unless you're a very good shot you'll need more than one bullet per target.

A Katana is the way to go. And a Wakizashi so you can go seppuku afterwards.

Michael Ezaiany · Post by **Michael Ezaiany** » Fri Apr 05, 2002 11:55 am

I was thinking more like a to cut my wrist while standing in the middle of a circle of bloody mutilated bodies. Heh, everyone would be so confused and noone wold believe that I chose this way just because it looks good.

Vazagi · Post by **Vazagi** » Fri Apr 05, 2002 12:14 pm

Here's an idea:
- Strap a bomb to your chest, so that they wont dare storming your position.
- Bring a gun and shoot your prey in the legs so they can't flee.
- Now it will be easy to position them in a circle as you slit their throats.
- Then slice your own wrist or detonate the bomb, result: The art of carnage...

Cypress · Post by **Cypress** » Fri Apr 05, 2002 12:23 pm

You storm into an office building holding a knife, and a gun... you say you will kill everyone in the room one at a time.

Now only problem is you picked the Microsoft mailing district so not only do they not have souls, but they also are postal, you are in a world of hurt.

They all charge you like feral animals, you manage to shoot two and maybe kill one of them, you stab on guy in the shoulder, but another one comes from behind and kill you right there.

Result? go to Microsoft if you want to kill something!

Vazagi · Post by **Vazagi** » Fri Apr 05, 2002 12:41 pm

If you go to Microsoft you should at least bring a nuke...

El SillY · Post by **El SillY** » Fri Apr 05, 2002 12:47 pm

I wouldn't recommend doing anything at all at this stage to microsoft, they are better than a lot of stuff. Now what I would recommend is not taking out a pitiful 20 people, go out with a bang, exterminate life as we know it, blow the fucking planet into very small pieces. I'm thinking detonating the earths core kinda bang, anti-matter bombs (oooo, aaaa, if you manage to fix so the antimatter is stable long enough you will also have made a great contribution to science too, um...). Anyway, that way you would also make the universe the biggest service ever.

-El SillY, big-motherfucking-boom

Michael Ezaiany · Post by **Michael Ezaiany** » Fri Apr 05, 2002 1:10 pm

That are all good ideas, but I'll stick to my original version. I'll get a gun (a father of my friend has Beretta, the only problem is the ammo). I'll get five clips of ammo. Then, I'll just walk throught the streets of Prague and shoot people on sight, leaving the last bullet for myself.

'If I have to go to Hell, I'm taking you there as well!'

DJ Pirtu · Post by **DJ Pirtu** » Sat Apr 06, 2002 2:52 am

Well, this didn't turn out just the way I expected it to.