I confess

[ManaUser]

I meant that cat tongues would be terrible for oral sex, and licking the same spot for an extended period of time is sort of the point.

Well yeah. My point was just that they can be delicate if they want to. They don't seem to have a problem with licking their own privates after all.

[Vedius Pollio]

Some good news:

My nemesis is now the most hated man in the Student Union. The faction that nominated him for secretary has now abandoned him and his only ally is a loony toon Zionist homophobe (whose last 7 girlfriends all became lesbians because his penis traumatised them for life; I'm not kidding). In the mean while, my zine has been a massive success (and a lot of people have praised its articles, especially the article where I describe, in graphic detail, my sexual experiments with other men; and the article where I instruct people on how to finger the vagina correctly) and my spam emails have won wide acclaim. Seriously, how often do you get people writing to you and saying "your email spam is really really good" ?

A friend of mine (who is doing her thesis on Derrida) sold me her cream whipper. I've found nangs really helpful for dealing with occasional bouts of depression: they're calming, they feel almost like having an orgasm (better, imho!), and, best of all, THEY HAVE NO REAL CONSEQUENCES and it's not difficult to use them in moderation. Nangs, in my opinion, are superior to Yoga, Buddhism, and other primitive forms of mind expansion. [Next week, I'm going to take my whipper to the brothel and share a balloon with my favourite hippie working girl, the one who gets wet really easily. The great thing about nangs is, being dissociatives, they produce effects similar to cerebral palsy, such as drooling. Giving nitrous to a girl and watching her lose control over her somatic peripheral nervous system is a total turn-on!!!]

EDIT: Also, while it is illegal to bring alcohol into a brothel (and illegal drugs too, though some of the girls undoubtedly keep them in the "locker room"), there are no laws against bringing a cream whipper, canisters, and balloons into a legal brothel, because those items are not intended for human consumption. So, Yay!!!

Furthermore, I've done a lot of research for my novel at the State Library of Victoria Archives. I'm starting to develop a lot of interesting material. Let's just say that my planned writing will involve lots and lots of warm female drool. I'm also researching the history of Welsh Calvinistic Methodism and finding lots of exciting historical information. I think that my planned novel shall be one of the most depressing stories ever written by an Australian, though my narrator's overall misery will be punctuated by several moments of warm and happy inebriation, produced by the drool and mucous of other females (with whom, alas, she can never enter a full relationship).

Also, I've had no trouble turning in my work on its due date, for the first time in three years. And I've started going to the gym and using this really nice equipment without any trainers leering behind my back.

I will report to these forums next on June the 8th. More good news will hopefully follow.

P.S.
If it wasn't for my looming essays, I would offer to proof-read your fiction, KittyBoy.

[Vedius Pollio]

Also, over the past month, Facebook has taught me that gay Christians can be really annoying.

I mean really really annoying.

[Xero]

I confess I thought VP was leaving

I also confess I"ve been stupid tired lately
and my eye has been bugging me

[Chthulhu]

I confess that I made the mistake of watching this video ( http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0ltAGuuru7Q&fmt=18 ) after consuming more than my usual amount of alcohol, resulting in my bawling my eyes out against my wife's chest.

On the plus side, I was bawling my eyes out against my wife's chest.

[Vedius Pollio]

I confess I thought VP was leaving

Was going to ask:

Is there a way to permanently destroy one's account?

[Churba]

I confess I thought VP was leaving

Was going to ask:

Is there a way to permanently destroy one's account?

I'm sure he didn't mean it like that. I think he meant "Wasn't vedius taking a leave of absence?" more than "Why isn't he gone yet?" - well, that's the way I read it, at least.

[Vedius Pollio]

I confess I thought VP was leaving

Was going to ask:

Is there a way to permanently destroy one's account?

I'm sure he didn't mean it like that. I think he meant "Wasn't vedius taking a leave of absence?" more than "Why isn't he gone yet?" - well, that's the way I read it, at least.

For a moment I thought I'd crossed the line with my confession that I like nitrous oxide.

Also, I've just realised that Little Shop of Horrors was totally inaccurate.

Nitrous doesn't make people giggle maniacally. It makes them feel like Terri Schiavo; Terri Schiavo cumming while a sympathetic male nurse licks out her vegetable pussy!

[Xero]

I confess I thought VP was leaving

Was going to ask:

Is there a way to permanently destroy one's account?

email the admin?

also I ignore most of what you post because its usually a big wall of text, and I only give casual attention to the forums



also I confess I'm kicking some Alien AI ass 69ways to satori

[Vedius Pollio]

I confess that the Pet Shop Boys wrote some really good songs in the 80s:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-d0GARTk ... re=channel

[ManaUser]

For a moment I thought I'd crossed the line with my confession that I like nitrous oxide.

No, no, we're used to you by now.

[Churba]

I confess that the Pet Shop Boys wrote some really good songs in the 80s:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-d0GARTk ... re=channel

Quoted for truth. Oingo boingo, too.

[Vedius Pollio]

I confess that a few weeks ago I went to Sydney.

Jerry Springer the Opera was fantastic! This is the opening chorus (but it gets better): http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WHP3Zi0R ... re=related

I also saw a stage version of Kafka's Metamorphosis with really good acrobatics and a soundtrack by Nick Cave.

And, thankfully, it was set in Prague in the early 20th century, and not some idiotic "modern" setting. I would never forgive the director if he turned it into Office Space with giant beetles. (Although the Yiddish accents were ridiculous and over-done.)

Finally, I saw a really excellent stage production from the UK: it was an actress performing Kafka's story, "A Report to the Academy", where a monkey tells the tale of how it taught itself to behave like a human being. I met two people who said that they had seen a really good play from Africa (which, apparently, was the best thing they had ever seen on stage), but it never ran in Sydney, only in Wollongong.

I also met the graphic artist who was working on the magazine that will publish me, and bought a DVD documentary on Helvetica font. (Didn't have the pennies to buy anything on Oxford Street, and my schedule was too short to fully explore the Cross, but I spent half an hour hypnotised by the giant Coke sign.)

EDIT:
And there's this (strangely sentimental) song: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=d6aCdBaO ... re=related
Curious how the most poignant song in the entire musical comes out of the mouth of an obese stripper, who would have no dignity in the normal Jerry Springer show.

[Churba]

Hey, Vedius, Can I hit you up for a favor? I would like to consult with your mother on an issue, and I'm wondering if you'll do me a solid and middleman it for me.

[Vedius Pollio]

Hey, Vedius, Can I hit you up for a favor? I would like to consult with your mother on an issue, and I'm wondering if you'll do me a solid and middleman it for me.

I guess. What would you like to know?

My mother mostly does GP work, but she's also trained in dermatology (and knows quite a bit about Aboriginal health, too).

The main advantage of GPs is that they see more patients than any other kind of doctor. (Specialists barely see patients at all.) So, they're very good at determining which medicines work and which don't. (But some doctors are stupid and prescribe whatever the drug companies are spending their advertising budgets on. And some are even stupider and peddle naturopathic cures. Fortunately, my mother doesn't listen to dumb patients who get their medical advice from Today Tonight.)

[Vedius Pollio]

I confess that I'm once again on speaking terms with the cerebral palsy girl AND my cousin.

[Lulujayne]

I live 10 minutes walk away from Kafka's school and birthplace. Fuck this city is amazing. Also, David Černý is amazing, except for the creepy baby statues, or maybe because of them.

[Vedius Pollio]

I live 10 minutes walk away from Kafka's school and birthplace. Fuck this city is amazing.

Considering that Kafka is probably the greatest person of Czech Jewish ethnicity to have ever lived... ...yes, you deserve to be amazed!!!

Have you read Borges's "The Secret Miracle"?

It's about a Jewish author in Prague who is executed by the Nazis. One of Borges's best stories. (He wrote another, equally good, story from the perspective of the Nazis, called Deutsches Requiem, where a concentration camp commandant is about to be executed at Nuremberg.)

Here's the book on Demonoid: http://www.demonoid.com/files/details/1514650/775222/ (text files)
http://www.demonoid.com/files/details/1506548/6201776/ (audiobook)

That should have both "The Secret Miracle" and Deutsches Requiem. I hope you find the time to read them.

I'm not sure if Borges had ever been to Prague. (He studied in Switzerland, so he could possibly have visited.) But he does mention a lot of local landmarks in his story (like the Clementine library).

[Vedius Pollio]

I'm doing a drug report on Diazepam as a favor for someone, and the more I do, the more I worry about My Ex - despite the rough times we've had lately - and the more I want to slap about the moron quack who bloody well prescribed it to her. Seriously, He perscribed to a girl with BDD, anorexia, chronic depression, anxiety disorders, a tendancy to self-harm who is undergoing extreme stress at university a drug with Commn Side effects that include Anterograde Amnesisa and temporal recolection impairment, Depression, cognitive deficits including impairment of learning and severe effects to behavior and interpersonal relationships, and a severe risk of dependence and addiction, and an increased likelihood of suicidal ideolation, and in severe cases(with likelihood increasing from longterm use) of suicidal tendencies and acts - But prescribed this drug in direct conflict to it's Contraindications, interactions and special cautions, with, as best i can tell, little or no warning of any of these things.

Seriously, I'm baffled how he made it through med-school with that level of stupidity and such irresponsible behavior - Shit, I'm surprised they didn't stitch his lips shut just to ensure that he couldn't sully the Hippocratic oath by swearing it.

Edit - I might add that the only time she has acted normally - as far as I have been able to tell, and considering that I've known her since 2005, and with no exaggeration spent nearly every minute of nearly every day with her for 12 months(I lived mostly on savings and my business during that time, with only three points where I chose to be gainfully employed and thus away from her for about 6 to 8 hours a day - and one of those jobs, she worked alongside me and at our request, we shared the same shifts), I'm somewhat well versed on the topic - in the last nine months was when she wasn't taking Diazepam for a period of a few weeks.
However, she got back on the drug due to a combination of withdrawal/dependency and rebound syndrome, and returned to her behavioral pattern typical of the period when she was taking the drug.

Goddamn it Vedius, you just had to leave right before I could have done with your medical knowledge and helpful access to your mother the doctor.

I want to kill her doctor.

How much is she taking?
How long has she been taking it? (Give me as detailed a history as you can and I'll consult my mother.)

My advice (without speaking to my mother) is to wean her off the stuff. Benzo withdrawal is similar to opioid withdrawal (and some research suggests that it's even nastier; severe benzo addicts can even die from the symptoms if they go cold turkey). The sooner you start weaning her, the easier it will be.

But don't try to get her off it too quickly. She could *potentially* have symptoms worse than the kind that heroin addicts get. There's no way of estimating how sick she'll be, so just be gentle. You don't want to suddenly shock her with revelations of infidelity when she's on a drug that can cause suicidal behavior AND withdrawal symptoms which can also lead to suicide attempts. (From my own experience, the part of depression that really gets to me is the "trapped" sensation, like there are no doors leading anywhere. If her boyfriend dumps her -and he probably will, because a jerk won't stay near someone with baggage for very long- you should provide an open door for her. Make sure that she views you with some kind of hope, rather than as a closed-off region of the past.)

Make sure that she doesn't up her dosage (even if she starts to get tolerant), and when she's stabilised for maybe a week, get her to start decreasing bit-by-bit. See the video link at the end of this post.

The good news is that the success rate for weaning is 65%, so it's do-able. (And that's for any given attempt at weaning, so if the first attempt fails, the second will have a much higher chance of succeeding.)

Otherwise, giving a depressed person benzodiazepines is criminally stupid. Maybe an antidepressant would help instead. (In fact, that's what a doctor should be prescribing to a person with depression unless they're bipolar.) Benzodiazepines are for treating people who are too hyper, not people who are too depressed. That's why a lot of bipolar type 1 people use them.

(Note: it might help her anxiety disorders, because that's kind of what it's intended to do. But the depression is worrying.)

Let me reiterate: I want to kill her doctor.

EDIT:
Even tapering down causes some withdrawal symptoms. If they're too much to bear, taper at a slower rate. But make sure that you keep weaning upstream, regardless of how slowly you're doing it.

This is a very good video about tapering off benzos:
(It's a seminar by a doctor who specialises in weaning.)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TPQ6Kj5g3QQ&eurl

Also, does she trust you? I think that's the important thing.

[Churba]

I'll start another thread for this and copy the relevant posts into it, so I can tell the whole story - it's a bit long to dump it into this thread. Thanks for the advice, though - I'll hit you up with a PM and the entirety of the details to pass on to your mum.

You don't want to suddenly shock her with revelations of infidelity

I don't think they'll shock her terribly, considering that all the infidelity was on her part, not mine, and she's aware she cheated on me, or she wouldn't have lied to cover it up.

Though, It's doubtful you meant that particular cheating, so As for him - Well, He's one of those people who thinks they're smart, cunning and devious, when they're still really playing in the greasy kid's league. He'll fuck up, and he'll get caught. If he doesn't fuck up and she finds out/figures it out before he leaves her - not my business until I chose to make it my business.
I'll let her find out on her own, She wouldn't believe me at the moment anyway, and it's pretty likely she'll find out on her own because there is another girl at the university that he's shagging, and she's is getting the shits with Catherine - apparently, things are looking likely that she's going to force him to choose between her and Catherine, and odds are that he'll choose her.