A whale couple are swimming in the Arctic Ocean when they come upon a whaling boat.
"Holy fuck," says the male whale. "That's the boat that killed my family."
"Sons of fucking bitches," says the female whale.
"Well, we need to get them back. Here's what we're gonna do: swim underneath the boat, and then we'll exhale out of our blowholes, destroying the boat."
And so as planned, they swim under the boat and exhale, capsizing it. It's with angry glee that they watched the helpless sailors scramble and attempt to swim to safety.
"That's not enough. We should totally eat these mother fuckers," suggests the male whale.
But the female whale replies, "Whoa whoa whoa, wait just one goddamn minute here. Now I agreed to the blowjob, but I refuse to swallow and seaman."
I won't be the stars in your dark night.