The Official Livejournal Substitute Thread!

[McDuffies]

For a week and so I continously dream myself naked.

Was I there?

I dunno... let's see, were you? I think I can remember a 2-legged cat with orange fur and black stripes wearing a blue collar hanging around there too, but I'm not sure it was you because it wasn't showing any interest.

I looks like me to pretend I'm not interested.

[Pimpette]

I was having an excellent day off until about a half hour ago. I was on a roll... got up sevenish when the manho left for work, started laundry, washed all the dishes, kept laundry loads going, put away all the dvds that were lying around, tidied our bedroom. Realized I was suddenly out of laundry soap, so I headed down to the store, leaving my next load in the communal laundry room like I usually do. Bought a bunch of crap we needed (as well as laundry soap), get back to the laundry room.

Can't find my laundry card anywhere.
At all.

Our laundry machines are run by this SmartCard thing, instead of by coins as most washer/dryers do. Which is neat some of the time because I don't have to keep a jar of exact change sitting around. But it sucks most of the time because if you lose it... well... you're stuck in the SOL category. Like me.
Stroke of luck when I talked to the cleaning lady, she lent me her card to use until I'm done today, so at least I don't have to worry about where the hell I'm going to dry all the stuff that was in the washers.

But goddammit I just put like 40 bucks on that card, and NOW I lose it.
I guarantee I will find it an hour after I admit defeat and go to the super for a new one. And then we'll have two and I'll want to murder people. Ugh.

I don't feel quite so productive anymore today.

[Eve Z.]

I did the same with my credit card.

I lost my wallet once and I was desperate because I had most of my money there and the travelling card also and I was at the campus, awaaaay from home.
I had to cancel the card and the next day some dude told me that my travelling card was down there at the market. Someone found it. I found the wallet with the card in it, and as expected, not the money.

at least I could still travel low-price like student.

[TheSuburbanLetdown]

I just ate some Combos.

[Eve Z.]

I just ate an "A".

[Tellurider]

now that the US election is over, I can finally relax about the future of my country (my biggest worry was that we'd have some sort of disaster like in 2000) and focus on the next cloud of IMMINENT DOOM.

Don't rush to relax, let's see how the guy is turning out first.

I'm relaxed because the country isn't bickering and totally fucked up because the election was too close to call and no one knows who the hell the next president is going to be. We have a president-elect, it's all over, I've done my part and have no need for stress about it until January 20 when he actually becomes president.

[Rkolter]

They bought a bunch of doughnuts for training today, and nobody wanted the lemon filled one!

So I snagged it and scarfed it down in the server room. Muahahahaha!

[Killbert-Robby]

FUCK
and SHIT
and PISS
and FUCK AGAIN

I got a friendly email today. So the past few months have been like this
Apply to OCAS, Ontario college application thingy
SORRY ONE OF YOUR PAPERS DIDNT COME THROUGH, GET A NEW ONE
Apply for new diploma
Wait
Express it over
OK THIS IS AWESOME, BUT ONCE, BACK IN MIDDLE SCHOOL, YOU GOT A C+ IN ENGLISH, AND YOU'RE ALSO *FOREIGN* (dun dun dunnnn), SO YOU HAVE TO TAKE AN ENGLISH EXAM, KAY!?
Fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu, fine, I'll sit it
AWESOME, HOW ABOUT WE GIVE YOU A CONDITIONAL OFFER AND YOU CAN SIT IT HERE?
Thank you very much, I shall do that.
WHOOPS, JUST LOOKED UP THE REQUIREMENTS, CANT GIVE YOU A CONDITIONAL
Very well, I shall sit the exam here, in a couple weeks, then wait a month for the results
KAY
Wait
Keep up correspondence
Here are my results!
AWESOME, WE'LL JUST WAIT FOR OUR HARD COPY AND STICK YOU INTO THE COURSE
Yayyyyyy
LETS GET THAT VISA OF YOURS GOING WHILE WE WAIT
yaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay!
More time passes
SO WE GOT THE RESULTS, GOOD JOB ON GETTING AN A+++ IN YOUR EXPENSIVE LAST MINUTE TOEFL, OH, BTW, DID I FORGET TO TELL YOU? WHEN I LOOKED UP THE REQUIREMENTS, IT SAID THIS COURSE ISN'T OPEN TO *FOREIGNERS*


I am pissed as hell, I've lost months, and sank $1.5k+ into this, and only NOW does she tell me that the course isn't open to foreigners. I'm going to have many very stiff drinks, sober up, and by then its Canadian office hours and I'm going to rip her a new one so big she'll literally be shitting bricks
PISS

[KWill]

Gee. That really blows.

[Dr Legostar]

that pretty much exemplifies EVERY experience we've had with canada.

[Rkolter]

Welcome to Canada. Please drop your pants for the required physical. Ooh, your port isn't compliant with our probe. Oh well, if we push enough, it'll fit. Lube? Oh, that's contraband. We do have some sand. Would you like some sand? As lube? For your mandatory anal probe?

Canadians are cool. Canada's government eats puppies.

[Dr Legostar]

Welcome to Canada. Please drop your pants for the required physical. Ooh, your port isn't compliant with our probe. Oh well, if we push enough, it'll fit. Lube? Oh, that's contraband. We do have some sand. Would you like some sand? As lube? For your mandatory anal probe?

Canadians are cool. Canada's government eats puppies.

Some Canadians are cool.

[Rkolter]

Welcome to Canada. Please drop your pants for the required physical. Ooh, your port isn't compliant with our probe. Oh well, if we push enough, it'll fit. Lube? Oh, that's contraband. We do have some sand. Would you like some sand? As lube? For your mandatory anal probe?

Canadians are cool. Canada's government eats puppies.

Some Canadians are cool.

Statistically speaking, the majority of Canadians fall within three standard deviations of the norm. And the norm for Canadians is 'cool'.

[Dr Legostar]

Welcome to Canada. Please drop your pants for the required physical. Ooh, your port isn't compliant with our probe. Oh well, if we push enough, it'll fit. Lube? Oh, that's contraband. We do have some sand. Would you like some sand? As lube? For your mandatory anal probe?

Canadians are cool. Canada's government eats puppies.

Some Canadians are cool.

Statistically speaking, the majority of Canadians fall within three standard deviations of the norm. And the norm for Canadians is 'cool'.

i've found most of them to be pretty rude, at least in toronto.

[McDuffies]

Dunno, when my sister sent application for visa to get to conference in Canada, they sent her a prospect on how to obtain Canadian citizenship.

Maybe that was just a setup?

[Rkolter]

Statistically speaking, the majority of Canadians fall within three standard deviations of the norm. And the norm for Canadians is 'cool'.

i've found most of them to be pretty rude, at least in toronto.

Really? I only found rude ones in Quebec. If they could light that province on fire and then bury it somewhere, they'd be a pretty awesome country.

* the few cool Quebecites could move to another province and be saved the ravages of the purging fire. I think there may be as many as eight or nine of them.

[Dr Legostar]

Statistically speaking, the majority of Canadians fall within three standard deviations of the norm. And the norm for Canadians is 'cool'.

i've found most of them to be pretty rude, at least in toronto.

Really? I only found rude ones in Quebec. If they could light that province on fire and then bury it somewhere, they'd be a pretty awesome country.

* the few cool Quebecites could move to another province and be saved the ravages of the purging fire. I think there may be as many as eight or nine of them.

i think most of canada agrees with that sentiment.

[Killbert-Robby]

We still love you Phil

[Rkolter]

We still love you Phil

Phil is one of the eight or nine.

[Rkolter]

In other news, Beth and I have been married four years as of today.