I think I'm gonna die laughing.
I had no idea when I wrote it if it was genius or pathetic, so I left it up to your judgment =/
Mind you I think the actual written text should more emulate shitty erotic fantasy - like "I love you so much my bosom is exploding with passion" - but concept wise I think you got da shit down.
A clever assertion, but it arouses the problem that I've never read any of these "shitty erotic fantasies" that you speak of, so this kind of language is completely alien to me! So, it might be profitable if you'd add your own twistedness to the warped dialogue, which would also be beneficial in the manner that if anyone were to stumble open this freakish bit of Internet, I could haphazardly blame you for all of my transgressions and then spend the afternoon wallowing in my absolution!