Yamcha does a movie review

Postby Baby Bonnie Hood on Mon Jun 18, 2001 12:40 am

Why does this always happen? Why do movies based on video games suck? Is it a universal unwritten law for such movies to suck? It's giving video games a bad name.<P>------------------
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Postby Yamcha Hibiki on Mon Jun 18, 2001 12:59 am

Well, the first reasoning that comes to my head is the fact that Tomb Raider wasn't a good game to begin with, but I can't use that reasoning, cause Mortal Kombat was a horrible video game and it had a great movie. In fact Mortal Kombat is the only good video game to movie that I know of. Of course I actually like Double Dragon, but that was cause of B-factor, and had nothing to do with being good <IMG SRC="http://www.keenspace.com/forums/biggrin.gif"><P>------------------
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Postby Klonoa on Mon Jun 18, 2001 2:21 am

*reads Yamcha's review*<P>So, I guess you liked the movie then? <IMG SRC="http://www.keenspace.com/forums/tongue.gif"><P>You know what's weird? My mom loved that movie.<P>I saw it this weekend too with some friends and my mom tagged along too because she didn't have anything better to do. She thought Tomb Raider was a cool movie.<P>After the movie we went to Best Buy and I picked up Super Dodge Ball and my mom got the Tomb Raider soundtrack.<P>Now she wants to rent a Tomb Raider game sometime and play it.<P>She says Lara Croft is cool and she also says she doesn't understand why I don't like to play the Tomb Raider games. When I explained to her that I prefer more silly games where you fight magical cat creatures by throwing exploding dodge balls at them while hopping across flying lemonade whales, all she could say was, "how old are you?"<P>Sometimes I don't understand my mom. I think Pepsi brainwashed her.<P>But yes I thought the movie was dumb. And silly. But not in a good way. Silly as in things that work in video games don't always work in movies. Like her fighting statues and then one big statue (what was that, the 'boss character?') and how when Lara got hurt she drank something and instantly felt better. "Mmmm, my fifty health points are restored! Thanks, mister nondescript priest from the far East!"<P>I just had to laugh, though, when Lara was running around the walls of her house while shooting people in her pajamas.<P>*mobster voice*<P>Hey Yamcha, hows come youse didn't go see Atlantis and saw Tomb Raider instead? I told youse to go see Atlantis. It's not a very original movie, but at least it was better than Tomb Raider!<P>--Klonoa
HELP! I'm addicted to Super Dodge Ball all over again!
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Postby Yamcha Hibiki on Mon Jun 18, 2001 2:40 am

I had no choice on the movie, a group of friends were all like "Let's go watch Tomb Raider!" so it was either stay home, or watch Tomb Raider.<P>------------------
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Postby Vic Viper on Mon Jun 18, 2001 4:01 am

Thanks for saving my 5 bucks. Besides, I have never played "Tomb Raider" in my entire life.<P>------------------
<IMG SRC="http://www.videogamedc.com/1/vv6.gif"> <I>For great justice. Take off every Vic.</I><p>[This message has been edited by Vic Viper (edited 06-18-2001).]
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Postby Yagami on Mon Jun 18, 2001 4:21 am

the movie should of been called "Hey Lets look at My Tits". Tomb Raider = bad game, go figure.<P>-Ya"more than a mouthful"gami
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Postby Yamcha Hibiki on Mon Jun 18, 2001 4:27 am

<BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Yagami:
<B>the movie should of been called "Hey Lets look at My Tits". Tomb Raider = bad game, go figure.<P>-Ya"more than a mouthful"gami</B><HR></BLOCKQUOTE><P> HOLY SHIT! I haven't seen you post in ever, Yagami! You gave me a forking heart attack!<P>To Vic Viper: Glad I could help <IMG SRC="http://www.keenspace.com/forums/biggrin.gif"><P><P>------------------
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<A HREF="http://yamcha.keenspace.com" TARGET=_blank>Shinkutokimekisempukaku</A> - It's not just a gamer comic, it's a space gamer comic!
<A HREF="http://kane.keenspace.com" TARGET=_blank>Sub-Culture</A> - A mouse, a fox, and a whole lot of nothing.
<A HREF="http://comicollage.keenspace.com/" TARGET=_blank>Comicollage</A> - Proving that even 7 people put together can't make a decent comic. :p
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Postby Klonoa on Mon Jun 18, 2001 5:01 am

Sorry, I know this has nothing to do with Tomb Raider, but I just want to say how FREAKIN' AWESOME GBA Super Dodge Ball is. Yamcha you have to get this game! It's the best thing Atlus has done since Tail Concerto was brought over here. I just unlocked two Dream Teams and I'm getting pretty good at doing the fancy stuff like running to throw the ball, then call a teammate to start running so I can throw it to him, have him jump and throw it to one of my outfielders who can continue the power move from the opposing team's rear, and send them all flying! HA! I love this game! There's over 50 special throws, and they're all easy to execute...not like that SNK Dodge Ball game that's actually a fighting game cleverly in disguise. So make sure to get Super Dodge Ball next!<P>--Klonoa
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Postby AnotherHalo on Mon Jun 18, 2001 5:25 am

Well,,, Hello again...
Wells ya, we went to see the Tomb Raider movie..
I wanted to see--it expecting some coolness
My expectations were in the range of the Matrix or Blade or even Charlie's Angels--it was not.. The movie was not that bad, it was not that good either.. it was, needless to say, something to occupy my extra time.. Now, to Digress.. We also went to see ATLANTIS, Saturday night.. It was better. It was actually--quite amusing. of course Leroy pointed out the fact that the movie was not shown to its full width.. the sides were cut off by the curtains. it was much goodness,,
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Postby Yamcha Hibiki on Mon Jun 18, 2001 5:48 am

<BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by AnotherHalo:
<B>Well,,, Hello again...
Wells ya, we went to see the Tomb Raider movie..
I wanted to see--it expecting some coolness
My expectations were in the range of the Matrix or Blade or even Charlie's Angels--it was not.. The movie was not that bad, it was not that good either.. it was, needless to say, something to occupy my extra time.. Now, to Digress.. We also went to see ATLANTIS, Saturday night.. It was better. It was actually--quite amusing. of course Leroy pointed out the fact that the movie was not shown to its full width.. the sides were cut off by the curtains. it was much goodness,,</B><HR></BLOCKQUOTE><P> Damn, wish I got to see it ;_;<P><P>------------------
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<A HREF="http://yamcha.keenspace.com" TARGET=_blank>Shinkutokimekisempukaku</A> - It's not just a gamer comic, it's a space gamer comic!
<A HREF="http://kane.keenspace.com" TARGET=_blank>Sub-Culture</A> - A mouse, a fox, and a whole lot of nothing.
<A HREF="http://comicollage.keenspace.com/" TARGET=_blank>Comicollage</A> - Proving that even 7 people put together can't make a decent comic. :p
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Postby Yamcha Hibiki on Mon Jun 18, 2001 11:31 am

You know, every time they make a live action movie based on a video game 9/10 of the time it's going to suck, well the movie I review today was no different. What movie am I talking about? Tomb Raider.
It's been a long time since I've seen a stupid movie in a theater, and furthermore I never saw a movie that I walked out on, well I almost walked out on this movie, but let's get to the point.
The story of Tomb Raider is how Lara Croft, a noted tomb raider is trying to find the hidden pieces of a treasure called the "Triangle of Light" that her father was searching for before her, but watch out Lara, a evil organization called "The Illuminaty" are after it to, and will use it's powers to take over the world (gasp)! Sounds pretty generic, huh? Well it is.
See I knew this movie would be generic and stupid when I went to watch it, but for gods sake I was hoping for at least a good action scene. Well, there's none worth seeing the movie for, cause the mere stupidity of the movie ruins the action. I mean everytime I thought it couldn't get any stupider, it did. First there was Lara fighting the goofy robot, I was willing to except that. Then she started running on the sides of the walls of her house, statues started coming to life in ancient temples, Lara gets sucked up into a glowing globe, Lara forgets to not hold a knife by the blade and cuts herself, and the idiot villain magically knows how to fight in the ending. Yup, this is one DAMN stupid movie. I especially like how dumb the villain is in this movie, I know all movie villains are generally pretty stupid, but this guy made the villains of the old Josie and the Pussycats cartoons look brilliant. I could go on about how I hated this movie or thought it was stupid, but I think every time I remember parts of this movie my IQ goes down several points, so I'll stop before I become a drooling vegetable.
Overall on a scale of 1 and 5, I give this movie a 1, cause it's the lowest rating I can give <IMG SRC="http://www.keenspace.com/forums/biggrin.gif"> This movie is formulaic, stupid, and horribly done, and if you have the real want to see a good Tomb Raider movie, you may just have to resort to watching an Indiana Jones movie and pretend that Indy is Lara Craft, cause the movie actually called Tomb Raider is anything but good. <P><P>------------------
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<A HREF="http://yamcha.keenspace.com" TARGET=_blank>Shinkutokimekisempukaku</A> - It's not just a gamer comic, it's a space gamer comic!
<A HREF="http://kane.keenspace.com" TARGET=_blank>Sub-Culture</A> - A mouse, a fox, and a whole lot of nothing.
<A HREF="http://comicollage.keenspace.com/" TARGET=_blank>Comicollage</A> - Proving that even 7 people put together can't make a decent comic. :p
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Postby Yagami on Thu Jun 21, 2001 1:43 am

hopefully, Final Fantasy, will not disappoint. I am looking to at least a damn good show of 3d effecs.<P>-Ya"The Spirits Within"gami
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Postby Klonoa on Thu Jun 21, 2001 2:22 am

Yeah I want to go see the Final Fantasy movie, too. But I'm sad because there's no moogles or chocobos or any of that neat stuff. It basically looks like a computer animated Aliens movie.<P>--Klo"putting words between my name sounds funny"noa
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Postby Yamcha Hibiki on Thu Jun 21, 2001 3:45 am

Yeah, the FF movie looks cool, too bad it's not very FF-ish. I'm sure it's only called Final Fanasty to make sure it will be successful.<P>Yamcha "Yagami and Klonoa are fruits" Hibiki
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Postby Klonoa on Thu Jun 21, 2001 3:58 am

<BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Yamcha Hibiki:
<B> Yeah, the FF movie looks cool, too bad it's not very FF-ish. I'm sure it's only called Final Fanasty to make sure it will be successful.<P>Yamcha "Yagami and Klonoa are fruits" Hibiki</B><HR></BLOCKQUOTE><P>Yeah you can say that again...and again and again (which you did, apparently).<P>Hey wait a minute, did you just call me a fruit? You'd better watch it, or I'll bring back some of my relatives from Alabama and sic them on you! <IMG SRC="http://www.keenspace.com/forums/smile.gif"><P>Well if I have to be a fruit I want to be a pineapple. Or a kiwi. Or a 300 point strawberry.<P>--Klonoa
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Postby Yamcha Hibiki on Thu Jun 21, 2001 4:12 am

<BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Klonoa:
<B> Yeah you can say that again...and again and again (which you did, apparently).<P>Hey wait a minute, did you just call me a fruit? You'd better watch it, or I'll bring back some of my relatives from Alabama and sic them on you! <IMG SRC="http://www.keenspace.com/forums/smile.gif"><P>Well if I have to be a fruit I want to be a pineapple. Or a kiwi. Or a 300 point strawberry.<P>--Klonoa</B><HR></BLOCKQUOTE><P> If I was a fruit I'd be a watermelon<P><P>------------------
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<A HREF="http://yamcha.keenspace.com" TARGET=_blank>Shinkutokimekisempukaku</A> - It's not just a gamer comic, it's a space gamer comic!
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<A HREF="http://comicollage.keenspace.com/" TARGET=_blank>Comicollage</A> - Proving that even 7 people put together can't make a decent comic. :p
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Postby Klonoa on Thu Jun 21, 2001 4:39 am

<BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Yamcha Hibiki:
<B> If I was a fruit I'd be a watermelon<P>
</B><HR></BLOCKQUOTE><P>"If I were a bunny I'd HOP HOP HOP!"
"If I were a rhino I'd STOMP STOMP STOMP!"
"If I were a fish I'd SCREAM SCREAM SCREAM!"<P>Sorry, I just felt the need to quote The PowerPuff Girls for some reason.<P>--Klonoa
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Postby Mutt on Thu Jun 21, 2001 4:52 am

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Person (whispering): He means fruits.
Japanese Scientist: Ah fruits!<P>------------------
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Postby BlackHalo on Thu Jun 21, 2001 5:39 am

Yeah, we saw the PREVIEWS for the Final Fantasy Movie..
And, I'd swear when it was done, Aki Ross and the whole "plot" of the movie, reminded me of Segourney Weaver, in that , that, help me here, ALIENS movie.
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Postby RainyDayMan on Thu Jun 21, 2001 6:47 am

i want to see scary movie 2, this one looks funny, unlike the first one. and hopefully this one has less penis.
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