The Uberbean's first "serious" story.

Jin-roh · Post by **Jin-roh** » Wed Sep 06, 2006 7:50 am

It starts today. This is my first, planned out story arc. Please critique.

Jin-roh · Post by **Jin-roh** » Wed Sep 13, 2006 7:06 am

*bump*
The story continues. Andy's ex-girlfriend, who he'd rather not have anything to do with, is visiting. Please give feedback.

That guy · Post by **That guy** » Wed Sep 13, 2006 1:24 pm

Not sure quite what to give ya - it's going well so far, but this doesn't strike me as a terribly serious storyline. A friend with some history is visiting, not a lot of drama on the surface. Not knowing your characters makes it difficult to know what's at stake for them.

Couple things to keep in mind in general as you continue getting more serious in your storylines:
1) You MUST make them laugh before they'll cry. If you want anyone to care about your characters, you have to remind them that these characters are funny people who make them happy - and THEN kill off everyone's favorite puppy - or whatever. Peak funny, THEN drama.
2) If you're doing a serious strip, COMMIT. If you're funny EVERY day and then TOTALLY somber for one strip, it will have WAY more impact than if you try to slide serious into three of four funny comics.

Jin-roh · Post by **Jin-roh** » Wed Sep 13, 2006 6:27 pm

Okay thanks. Bear in mind, the story is already written and queued to go. I do keep it funny for the most part, but the climax (2nd half of the climax) is serious with mild humor.

Jin-roh · Post by **Jin-roh** » Wed Sep 27, 2006 9:37 pm

**bump**

This story arc will be ending monday. I'd like to get some feed back to see if I actually pulled of something good by then.