Club Reality vs. Actual reality

Sketchywallflowr · Post by **Sketchywallflowr** » Sun Apr 16, 2006 8:45 pm

Has anyone ever noticed that the laws of the real world kinda stop when entering a club? I went to my very first club (and BBW dance, yay fun!) just the other night. And it amazes me and somewhat appalls me how different people are in clubs. For example, would it be appropriate for some stranger on the street to come up to you and give you a hug? It's be nice, depending on the sketchiness of said stranger, but not really a usual occurance. But in a club, someone can walk up behind you while you're dancing and start bumpin' and grinding! And that's okay! And that confuses me. Is there some law of the indoors where loud, bad music and strobe light are that say "And once ye pass through this door, ye shall ne'er mind a grope and creepy stare from strangers"?

Dave Against The Machine · Sun Apr 16, 2006 8:49 pm

Yea it's called drugs, alcohol, and not giveing a shit. *shrugs*

Garneta · Post by **Garneta** » Sun Apr 16, 2006 8:54 pm

Yeah, the inebriation level seems to factor in quite a bit there. I've only been clubbing a couple times. Once I was sober. It was pretty boring. The other time, I was about half drunk (friends bachelorette party...teh fun) and it made a world of difference. I actually danced, and spent half the time flirting with some random guy. And it was fun.

Vorticus · Post by **Vorticus** » Sun Apr 16, 2006 8:59 pm

The dancing has something to do with it as well. People like to move communally, especially when you get to come into close contact like that.

Realityendshere · Post by **Realityendshere** » Sun Apr 16, 2006 9:04 pm

It's my theory that the more fun you have and the later it gets the less you think about trivial things like "reality", "what's acceptable" and "common sense"

And if you add some booze... well....

Yeahduff · Post by **Yeahduff** » Sun Apr 16, 2006 9:11 pm

Sketchywallflowr wrote: But in a club, someone can walk up behind you while you're dancing and start bumpin' and grinding! And that's okay! And that confuses me. Is there some law of the indoors where loud, bad music and strobe light are that say "And once ye pass through this door, ye shall ne'er mind a grope and creepy stare from strangers"?

Well, this isn't quite the case. If you're uncomfortable with some scumbag dancing too closely and familiarly with you, you've every right to extract yourself from the situation or send the asshole walking. A lot of girls will have their friends bail them out if a certain signal is given. This often involves cutting in as if you and your friend are dating (works twice as well if your friend is also a woman). Some girls just go someplace else. And some have no problems being outright about it and either tell him to get the fuck out of here or even shove the guy (hurrah for mangled English). In either case, the proper etiquette is for a guy to ask you to dance. Unfortunately, a lot of guys, particularly in clubs, are not aware of this. But don't put up with anyone's crap.

TheSuburbanLetdown · Post by **TheSuburbanLetdown** » Sun Apr 16, 2006 9:26 pm

I don't ket anyone touch me, no matter where I am.

I think people do these things because dance clubs are surreal. I was at some weird place called Smart Bar and it was all dark and loud and weird. I didn't feel like I really existed at that point. A lot of it had to do with the darkness and trance music.

K-Dawg · Post by **K-Dawg** » Sun Apr 16, 2006 10:35 pm

yeahduff wrote:
A lot of girls will have their friends bail them out if a certain signal is given.

Ah yes, so many times I have been that friend to bail them out.

Killbert-Robby · Post by **Killbert-Robby** » Sun Apr 16, 2006 11:18 pm

Clubs...scare me. I used to go clubbing alot. Now I stick to Irish Pubs. Just so much more...relaxed.

Corgan_dane · Post by **Corgan_dane** » Mon Apr 17, 2006 4:32 am

Best part of clubbing is watching the fools with the lightsticks think they're cool because they have two three dollar plastic glowsticks...AND THEY CAN MOVE THEM FAST!

AMAZING!

Cope · Post by **Cope** » Mon Apr 17, 2006 4:41 am

Aw, but they're so glowy and pretty...

And stop winking at me!

McDuffies · Post by **McDuffies** » Mon Apr 17, 2006 4:58 am

One script I'm working on has a lengthy monologue about social rules that work on parties and how different they are, being that people communicate with body language and try to catch vibes from other people... I have several versions of that monologue and I have yet to pick one.

Rkolter · Post by **Rkolter** » Mon Apr 17, 2006 5:18 am

I look at it this way:

You see something going on that you are uncomfortable with in this club. You choose to stay regardless. You see that people are bumping and grinding on the dance floor and realize that this might disturb you. You choose to dance, regardless.

You have not given up your right to not be touched, but you have most certainly given up your right to be outraged if you are touched. Likewise, you have not given up your right to say 'no'. You have however taken on the responsibility of saying 'no'.

Take a similar situation - assume you are heterosexual, and you go with a gay friend to a gay bar (I've been in this situation, which is why I bring it up). You have the right to say 'no' if someone of your own gender asks you to dance, but you don't have the right to be outraged - you accepted the environment when you entered the establishment.

If you don't like this club's scene, then go to another club whose scene you do like. They aren't all the same.

Glarryg · Post by **Glarryg** » Mon Apr 17, 2006 5:33 am

That's a good way of putting it, rkolter.

Glarryg

Tellurider · Post by **Tellurider** » Mon Apr 17, 2006 5:44 am

Oh, man, do I ever have stories about clubbing.

I think a lot of people actually go to clubs with the assumption that other people are going to be drunk/on drugs and looking to hook up. That's really not a fair assumption, as I've had an awesome time at clubs without either of those things, but in a lot of ways clubs are like frat parties. Sketchy guys assume that girls are there to get laid.

I am a magnet for short, sketchy guys. And when I say short I mean 6 inches shorter than me. The best defense really is to ignore them or, when they touch you, to step away quickly and give them a dirty look. NEVER EVER SMILE AT THEM. If you smile they think you're playing hard to get. You must repress the instinct to flash a "sorry I'm not interested" smile. You think you're being nice, they think you're flirting.

Tynan · Post by **Tynan** » Mon Apr 17, 2006 9:06 am

I hug anyone I want...for I am the Camwhore king!

Diplomatic immunity. :p Suck on that Latveria!

Guildmaster Van · Post by **Guildmaster Van** » Mon Apr 17, 2006 9:55 am

I don't like clubs, mainly because I don't like loud noises that drown everything else out and I don't like large crowds of people.

Prettysenshi · Post by **Prettysenshi** » Mon Apr 17, 2006 9:57 am

PeppermintAfterlife wrote: A lot of it had to do with the darkness and trance music.

I think a lot of has to do with it being dark. Half the shit that happens in clubs would never happen if it was well lit and people really could see who they were talking to/dancing with/dry humping.

Dave Against The Machine · Mon Apr 17, 2006 10:17 am

Cope wrote:Aw, but they're so glowy and pretty...

And stop winking at me!

Yes preatty. TRUE GROOVE. A comic i love to read did a thing about that once. http://truegroove.comicgen.com/d/20060324.html

Yea I dont go much either. Only to the ones with live bands. And if theres a good band playing. I have a fear of crows when people really close to me are smokeing cigs. Cause one time when i was really little. I got burned in the face by a ladies cig.

Tynan · Post by **Tynan** » Mon Apr 17, 2006 10:39 am

Guildmaster Van wrote:I don't like clubs, mainly because I don't like loud noises that drown everything else out and I don't like large crowds of people.

....then how can you stand Quebec?

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Club Reality vs. Actual reality

Club Reality vs. Actual reality

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Not that I've ever been clubbing...

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