Revenge!

[Crazy Chris]

You can go the easy way by making chillie out of his parents and get him to it it.

[VileTerror]

* adds another gold star beside Kolter's name in a little torn parchment then reviews *

. . . damn.

Kolter, if you ever come collecting . . . well, I'm not sure there is a soul of the necessary grade, so will you accept multiple inferior souls?

[Gengar003]

Never piss off a scientist.

Or a sys admin. Though a sys admin won't be as devious as the scientist.

Only because the sys admins lack the facilities of the scientists. When our buildings are completely integrated with computers, controlling the air, elevators, lights, environmental controls, windows, door, EVERYTHING, THEN the sys admins will be able to pull "HALs" on those who displease them.

[VileTerror]

That is why we must replace sys-ops with complex and utterly unemotional AIs. Sure there will be a few bugs to sort out, but better now than when they control our clean air supply.

[Rkolter]

No thanks on the AIs.

[VileTerror]

<a href="http://jabberwacky.com">* forcibly replaces Kolter with a rudimentary AI *</a>

[Rkolter]

*Shoots the AI with a laser*

Ball of light, remember?

[VileTerror]

OY, OY, OY! I said "forcibly", didn't I? *slaps Kolter and makes certain he's properly locked up before repairing and reactivating the AI*

[Rkolter]

*absorbs the AI*

I mean, jeez. I thought you'd figure this out by now.

*slaps VT with a salmon*

[VileTerror]

That's it!

* teleports Kolter into another dimension *

And don't come back until you're sorry!

[Rkolter]

*pops back into three dimensions*

Multi-dimensional creature, duhhhhhhh.

Look, if you want to contain me, you'll need to find one of my two nemesis - a jilted ex-girlfriend or a vaccum cleaner.

[Ian Moulding]

Back off, Kolter! I have an electrolux and I know how to use it!

<_<

>_>

Well, I kinda know how to use it. The carpet is getting a bit crunchy...

[Czar]

Knowing how to use something and wanting to use something are two different things, all things considered.

[Vorticus]

That is why we must replace sys-ops with complex and utterly unemotional AIs. Sure there will be a few bugs to sort out, but better now than when they control our clean air supply.

Or you could just bribe the sys admin. They're more susceptible to that than any AI would be. Which is a bonus if the AI decides it doesn't need you.

[Gengar003]

... H4x t3h A1!!!!1111!!11 omglolbob11!!11!````~~


Sincere aplogies for the leet. It cried out to be posted. And offered me pie.

[Blackaby]

Post about him on the internet.

Really, you can ruin peoples lives using this thing.

I know I have!

[ManyWorlds]

If you feel like being really evil, send him a singing Strip-o-gram at his workplace. A *male* strip-o-gram... person... thingy.

[Rkolter]

Here's an old one but good one. It only costs a few bucks too...

1) Get his address.

2) Write a letter to him explaining that you are a concerned mother and that he should refrain in the future from giving your daughter gifts, even on her birthday, touching your daughter (including hugs), inviting your daughter into his house for any reason, etcetera. Tell him that his gifts are unappreciated and have been given to charity. Tell him when he offered to walk your daughter home from school, it scared her too much to say 'no', and that even if unintentional, his actions verge on stalking, and that you believe your concerns are legitimate.

Then, tell him that you have sent duplicate letters to all his neighbors. Sign it, A concerned mother of a frightened little girl

Some safety tips:
1) Buy a fresh ream of paper.
2) Buy a fresh box of envelopes.
3) Do not touch the paper or envelopes. Use leather gloves.
4) Print the letter and envelope on a printer at school (not home or work)
5) No return address (obviously)
6) Do not lick the stamp. Use water or a self-adhesive stamp.
7) Drop it into a public mailbox miles away from where you live.
8 - Until you mail it, keep this letter in a fresh ziplock baggie.
9) Do Not actually alert his neighbors, no matter how tempting.

[ManyWorlds]

Here's an old one but good one. It only costs a few bucks too...

1) Get his address.

2) Write a letter to him explaining that you are a concerned mother and that he should refrain in the future from giving your daughter gifts, even on her birthday, touching your daughter (including hugs), inviting your daughter into his house for any reason, etcetera. Tell him that his gifts are unappreciated and have been given to charity. Tell him when he offered to walk your daughter home from school, it scared her too much to say 'no', and that even if unintentional, his actions verge on stalking, and that you believe your concerns are legitimate.

Then, tell him that you have sent duplicate letters to all his neighbors. Sign it, A concerned mother of a frightened little girl

Some safety tips:
1) Buy a fresh ream of paper.
2) Buy a fresh box of envelopes.
3) Do not touch the paper or envelopes. Use leather gloves.
4) Print the letter and envelope on a printer at school (not home or work)
5) No return address (obviously)
6) Do not lick the stamp. Use water or a self-adhesive stamp.
7) Drop it into a public mailbox miles away from where you live.
8 - Until you mail it, keep this letter in a fresh ziplock baggie.
9) Do Not actually alert his neighbors, no matter how tempting.

*salutes rkolter*

[PieceOfSkunk]

*erases "cross rkolter" from his list of things to do*