Revenge!

Jackhass · Post by **Jackhass** » Mon Aug 08, 2005 12:13 am

Give him a flying head scissors...

Dr Legostar · Post by **Dr Legostar** » Mon Aug 08, 2005 4:57 am

many years ago a friend of mine devised the perfect punishment for rapists, it might apply here. Two words: Salad Shooter.

TheSuburbanLetdown · Post by **TheSuburbanLetdown** » Mon Aug 08, 2005 9:47 am

Put spiders on hims while he's sleeping. Make sure some go in his mouth and nose.

Rkolter · Post by **Rkolter** » Mon Aug 08, 2005 10:22 am

Fuck him.

... no, really. Literally.

First, you mix a small batch of superglue and rubbing alcohol, use an 8 to 1 mixture. Apply this to the inside of the condom and reroll it. The alcohol will prevent the superglue from adhering. You'll want a non-lubricated condom.

Second, go to his place and get him hot and bothered, then in a sexy way, suggest you help him put on protection. Go get the doctored condom and put it on him.

Third, do the deed. The warmth will cause the rubbing alcohol to evaporate, leaving the superglue to adhere to both the condom and the skin.

Fourth, ask him for the money. When he refuses, tell him it's ok, because he just got fucked. Then leave, in a hurry.

Dr Legostar · Post by **Dr Legostar** » Mon Aug 08, 2005 10:26 am

rkolter wrote:Fuck him.

... no, really. Literally.

First, you mix a small batch of superglue and rubbing alcohol, use an 8 to 1 mixture. Apply this to the inside of the condom and reroll it. The alcohol will prevent the superglue from adhering. You'll want a non-lubricated condom.

Second, go to his place and get him hot and bothered, then in a sexy way, suggest you help him put on protection. Go get the doctored condom and put it on him.

Third, do the deed. The warmth will cause the rubbing alcohol to evaporate, leaving the superglue to adhere to both the condom and the skin.

Fourth, ask him for the money. When he refuses, tell him it's ok, because he just got fucked. Then leave, in a hurry.

::Will never, ever, cross rkolter...::

Rianeva · Post by **Rianeva** » Mon Aug 08, 2005 10:26 am

...That's low and deliciously evil. =p

Dburkhead · Post by **Dburkhead** » Mon Aug 08, 2005 10:26 am

Never piss off a scientist.

TheSuburbanLetdown · Post by **TheSuburbanLetdown** » Mon Aug 08, 2005 10:32 am

dburkhead wrote:Never piss off a scientist.

Sounds like common knowledge.

Well, sort of.

Post by **Mercury Hat** » Mon Aug 08, 2005 11:39 am

legostargalactica wrote:
rkolter wrote:Fuck him.

... no, really. Literally.

First, you mix a small batch of superglue and rubbing alcohol, use an 8 to 1 mixture. Apply this to the inside of the condom and reroll it. The alcohol will prevent the superglue from adhering. You'll want a non-lubricated condom.

Second, go to his place and get him hot and bothered, then in a sexy way, suggest you help him put on protection. Go get the doctored condom and put it on him.

Third, do the deed. The warmth will cause the rubbing alcohol to evaporate, leaving the superglue to adhere to both the condom and the skin.

Fourth, ask him for the money. When he refuses, tell him it's ok, because he just got fucked. Then leave, in a hurry.
::Will never, ever, cross rkolter...::

Psh, all you have to do is be suspicious of if Ryan wants to sleep with you after you've screwed him over on something.

There's a lesson in this for us all

!

Risky · Post by **Risky** » Mon Aug 08, 2005 12:14 pm

Or by extension, anyone who has ever talked to him or heard him talk.

Isukiyomi · Post by **Isukiyomi** » Mon Aug 08, 2005 12:46 pm

Rianeva wrote:

...That's low and deliciously evil. =p

....

Warren · Post by **Warren** » Mon Aug 08, 2005 2:13 pm

legostargalactica wrote:
rkolter wrote:Fuck him.

... no, really. Literally.

First, you mix a small batch of superglue and rubbing alcohol, use an 8 to 1 mixture. Apply this to the inside of the condom and reroll it. The alcohol will prevent the superglue from adhering. You'll want a non-lubricated condom.

Second, go to his place and get him hot and bothered, then in a sexy way, suggest you help him put on protection. Go get the doctored condom and put it on him.

Third, do the deed. The warmth will cause the rubbing alcohol to evaporate, leaving the superglue to adhere to both the condom and the skin.

Fourth, ask him for the money. When he refuses, tell him it's ok, because he just got fucked. Then leave, in a hurry.
::Will never, ever, cross rkolter...::

::Will never, ever, boink rkolter...::

Rkolter · Post by **Rkolter** » Mon Aug 08, 2005 2:16 pm

Warren wrote:
legostargalactica wrote:
rkolter wrote:Fuck him.

... no, really. Literally.

First, you mix a small batch of superglue and rubbing alcohol, use an 8 to 1 mixture. Apply this to the inside of the condom and reroll it. The alcohol will prevent the superglue from adhering. You'll want a non-lubricated condom.

Second, go to his place and get him hot and bothered, then in a sexy way, suggest you help him put on protection. Go get the doctored condom and put it on him.

Third, do the deed. The warmth will cause the rubbing alcohol to evaporate, leaving the superglue to adhere to both the condom and the skin.

Fourth, ask him for the money. When he refuses, tell him it's ok, because he just got fucked. Then leave, in a hurry.
::Will never, ever, cross rkolter...::
::Will never, ever, boink rkolter...::

Oh noes!

What have I done?!

Dburkhead · Post by **Dburkhead** » Mon Aug 08, 2005 2:22 pm

rkolter wrote:
Warren wrote: ::Will never, ever, boink rkolter...::
Oh noes!

What have I done?!

It's a simple equation:

RKolter + condom + sex = big time no no.

All you need to do is remove any one term from the left hand side.

You could eliminate the middle term, but that's a risk fraught proposition unless. Hmm. You could try mutual monogamy with a known clean partner.

Nah.

McDuffies · Post by **McDuffies** » Mon Aug 08, 2005 4:58 pm

*writes "never sleep with Rkolter" in his notebook*

It'll be tough to remember.

ManyWorlds · Post by **ManyWorlds** » Mon Aug 08, 2005 5:48 pm

*adds rkolter to List of People to Ph34r*
Which is a lot worse than plain old fear.

On the note of revenge... train a dog to go berserk at the sound of his voice, and train it to attack the crotch.
Then give him the dog.

Nyke · Post by **Nyke** » Mon Aug 08, 2005 6:16 pm

legostargalactica wrote:many years ago a friend of mine devised the perfect punishment for rapists, it might apply here. Two words: Salad Shooter.

*winces*

Vorticus · Post by **Vorticus** » Mon Aug 08, 2005 7:42 pm

dburkhead wrote:Never piss off a scientist.

Or a sys admin. Though a sys admin won't be as devious as the scientist.

Neoflame · Post by **Neoflame** » Mon Aug 08, 2005 8:24 pm

scientists scare me

Dburkhead · Post by **Dburkhead** » Mon Aug 08, 2005 8:33 pm

neoflame wrote:scientists scare me

Then our work here is done.