The Teeny Tiny Itsy Bitsy Yellow Polka Dot Bikini Thread #1

[IVstudios]

Fun fact: Last time USA attacked Canada we beat them and burned the White House down.

Er... You said you knew history?

The war of 1812 began when the US declared war on Britain because they were attacking American trade ships.

Major events in the war:

1813, Battle of Thames, won by the US. It's the only major battle fought on "Canadian" soil.

1814, British set Washington DC on fire, and that fire additionally consumed the Presidential Mansion.

Also 1814, The Treaty of Ghent is signed, ending the war without a winner.

Flaws in your statement:

1) The only major battle fought on Canadian soil was won by the US.

2) "Canadians" didn't set fire to Washington D.C. British (out of Britain actually) did.

3) Canada wasn't even a NATION in 1812. You were colonies of the British Empire until your independence in 1867.

4) The White House did not exist as the white house in 1814. The president had a mansion called aptly, the Presidential Mansion. The mansion was burned to the ground, but not specifically selected - the entire city was burned.

5) Since the treaty was signed without either side surrendering, neither side "won".

Oh God, You've contradicted Van. "What has science done?!?!"

*Gets marshmallows, waits for flames"

[Wp]

Well, it's not like he didn't ask for it. VD is always looking for a fight.

[Rkolter]

For the record, I'm not fighting.

I'm giving factual, historical information that contradicts VD.

I'm going to suspect though, he already knows it (or some of it) and was just trying to poke us Americans a little. I bit, I suppose.

[IVstudios]

Well, we Americas do need a good poke every now and then. Lord knows we disserve it.

[JexKerome]

Wouldn't be surprised if he got that info from Arrogant Worms' "The War of 1812":


oo come back proud canadians
before you had tv
no hockey night in Canada
there was no CBC

In 1812 Madison was mad
he was the president, you know
well he thought he tell the british
where they ought to go
He thougth he'd invade Canada
he thought that he was tough
instead we went to Washington
and burned down all his stuff

And the White House burned burned burned
and we're the ones that did it
it burned burned burned
while the president ran and cried
it burned burned burned
and things were very historical
and the americans ran and cried like a bunch of little babies
wa wa waaaa
in the War of 1812

Now hillbillies from Kentucky
dressed in green and red
left home to fight in Canada
but they returned home dead
It's the only war the yankees lost
except for Vietnam
and also the Alamo
and the bay of... ham
The loser was America
the winner was ourselves
so join right in and gloat about
the War of 1812

And the White House burned burned burned
and we're the ones that did it
it burned burned burned
while the president ran and cried
it burned burned burned
and things were very historical
and the americans ran and cried like a bunch of little babies
wa wa waaaa
in the war of 1812

In 1812 we were just sittin' around
mindin' our own business
puttin' crops into the ground
we heard the soldiers coming
and we didnt like that sound
so we took a boat to Washington
and burned it to the ground

oh...
We fired our guns
but the yankees kept on coming
there wasn't quite as many
as there was a while ago
We fired once more
and the yankees started runnin'
down the Mississippi to the gulf of Mexico
They ran through the snow
and they ran through the forest
They ran throught the bushes where the beavers wouldn't go
they ran so fast that they forgot to take their culture
back to America and gulf of Mexico

So, if you go to Washington, its buildings clean and nice,
Bring a pack of matches, and we

[Brockway]

...

Well, here's an oldie, but I figured, hey, its on topic dagnabbit!

Jamie & Nick Guest Strip

[Grabmygoblin]

catchy war of 1812 song

everything I know about history I learned from catchy songs.
don't know if this link will work, supposed to take you to the cartoon the daily show had a few years ago for the midterm elections.

About the nipple-topic -- why ARE men allowed to run around without shirts?

When I see a topless guy with giant man-boobs (and I've seen many around here), I think that's much more obscene than a topless woman and her normal breasts.

I often ask myself that.

[YarpsDat]

And RKolter, thanks for giving me the mental image there... Mmm, victorian boobs... Hmm, we need a drooling smiley.

If you need one, steal one:

[JexKerome]

And RKolter, thanks for giving me the mental image there... Mmm, victorian boobs... Hmm, we need a drooling smiley.

If you need one, steal one:

I recommend the one grabmygoblin made. It's somewhere around here....

[Grabmygoblin]

And RKolter, thanks for giving me the mental image there... Mmm, victorian boobs... Hmm, we need a drooling smiley.

If you need one, steal one:

I recommend the one grabmygoblin made. It's somewhere around here....

heh. I didn't make it, I stole it from somewhere. *snuggles secret stash of emoticons*

[Van Douchebag]

I leave a topic for a few days and see what happens?

You're making excuses, rkolter - Canada still kicked America's ass.
*cough cough* Pigeon Hill.

Americans have a tendency to be sore losers when they don't win wars. Vietnam for example.

Pfft. Manifest destiny - what a joke.

[Rkolter]

I leave a topic for a few days and see what happens?

You're making excuses, rkolter - Canada still kicked America's ass.
*cough cough* Pigeon Hill.

Americans have a tendency to be sore losers when they don't win wars. Vietnam for example.

Pfft. Manifest destiny - what a joke.

I thought we were talking about the war of 1812. Do you mean the US civil war battle in Georgia (no Canadians there), or the skirmish in Canada in 1866? Neither was a war, they were individual battles.

[Van Douchebag]

I'm generalizing.
I'm just saying USA has a bad track record when it comes to fighting Canada.

Be it Manifest Destiny believers, or just the Fenians, Americans really never had the ability to conquer Canada.

[Rkolter]

Well... we're about 50/50. In 1812, we won. In 1866, Canada won.

Now seriously though, we spend more on our military than Canada's entire GNP(*). If we wanted Canada, we could take you. We'd lose the last of our allies, our economy would suffer greatly, yada yada yada, but in sheer size, we could overwhelm your military.

But if we took over Canada, we'd have no more clean air. The nice cold fronts you guys send us are crisp and clean (comparitively) to our smog-infested air. We'd industrialize the shit out of your forest land, and before you know it, we'd have no more fresh air imports from Canada.

* I'm talking out of my ass here. But we spend 400 billion a year. I don't know what Canada's GNP is.

[Van Douchebag]

Well, for 1812... okay, I'll let you have one.
Technically, though, Canada won.

It was a colony and, as part of the British empire, had both it's own irregulars plus the British army.


You know what the most laughable part of USA's modern army is in comparison to Canada?
America spends so much on military budget leaving their healthcare system literally for shit, whereas Canada has like three submarines and two of them are in that big mall out in Edmonton (Well, maybe not literally, but our army has shit for equipment) and a kickass health care system albeit it's having trouble these days thanks to the overcrowding and lack of new hospitals.

Here's the laughable part - even with all their fancy gear American soldiers underperform in comparison to Canadian soldiers, even when our soldiers are wearing green in a desert.
Militaries have their own kind of olympics, and more often than not Canada beats America at it.

Canada has the best snipers in the world, actually. We set distance records in Afghanistan.

[JPSloan]

That's because, on the whole, the American work ethic is for shit.

But gentlemen, let's please return to the topic at hand, which is young women stuffed into microbikinis.

[Rkolter]

Well, for 1812... okay, I'll let you have one.
Technically, though, Canada won.

It was a colony and, as part of the British empire, had both it's own irregulars plus the British army.

You know what the most laughable part of USA's modern army is in comparison to Canada?

America spends so much on military budget leaving their healthcare system literally for shit, whereas Canada has like three submarines and two of them are in that big mall out in Edmonton (Well, maybe not literally, but our army has shit for equipment) and a kickass health care system albeit it's having trouble these days thanks to the overcrowding and lack of new hospitals.

Here's the laughable part - even with all their fancy gear American soldiers underperform in comparison to Canadian soldiers, even when our soldiers are wearing green in a desert.
Militaries have their own kind of olympics, and more often than not Canada beats America at it.

Canada has the best snipers in the world, actually. We set distance records in Afghanistan.

The problem is American youths (total generality...) have a poor work ethic, and so while we do have a good number of honest, hard working troops we can be proud of, we also have a bunch of generally screwed up individuals at the enlisted ranks. It's been hard to recruit for the last decade or so, so the military has regularly had to drop their standards.

I've seen your healthcare system in action - a friend from Canada came down here, and promptly got very sick (no jokes please). It was no big deal for her to get any treatment she needed. That's a hell of a nice system, and yeah, we could do better. But the problem is, nobody in Congress wants to cut the military budget. We spend 400 billion - more in total than the rest of the world, on a yearly basis. No army can stand up to ours if we really truely turned expansionist and decided to take over some country and screw the civilian casualties. Yay us! I mean that... I like knowing we have such a strong military force. I just don't think it takes 400 billion annually to retain that capability. No military budget cut, and no new taxes means no better generalized healthcare.

And by the way, thanks for the decent arguement. First one I've had with you that hasn't collapsed into profanity and insults.

JPSloan is right imho... time to get back to stuffing hot chicks into tiny bikinis and putting their pictures on the thread.

[Mercury Hat]

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v63/M ... hcolor.jpg

The bikini isn't very itsy-bitsy, teeny-weeny, or yellow-polka-dotted, but I hope you'll overlook that.

[Van Douchebag]

The problem is American youths (total generality...) have a poor work ethic, and so while we do have a good number of honest, hard working troops we can be proud of, we also have a bunch of generally screwed up individuals at the enlisted ranks. It's been hard to recruit for the last decade or so, so the military has regularly had to drop their standards.

I've seen your healthcare system in action - a friend from Canada came down here, and promptly got very sick (no jokes please). It was no big deal for her to get any treatment she needed. That's a hell of a nice system, and yeah, we could do better. But the problem is, nobody in Congress wants to cut the military budget. We spend 400 billion - more in total than the rest of the world, on a yearly basis. No army can stand up to ours if we really truely turned expansionist and decided to take over some country and screw the civilian casualties. Yay us! I mean that... I like knowing we have such a strong military force. I just don't think it takes 400 billion annually to retain that capability. No military budget cut, and no new taxes means no better generalized healthcare.

Imagine if they cut 100 billion offa that military funding and put it into healthcare. Now that'd be something.

Another thing that pisses me off about the American army is that their budget is so huge yet some soldiers are forced to rely on food stamps to feed their family. The worst part is even with a huge budget they can't even find a cave dweller in the desert.

[IVstudios]

No, but we no doubt have an assload of the same kind of WMD