Welcome Feedback on a Project

[KWill]

Right, this is a first for me. I've been piddling around with a project that I showed to some of the CGers that showed up to the Thing, but now I'm about ready to get started on inking it and insecure about my work and self-taught as I am, I'd love to hear from people that know what they're talking about about whether my work is good, whether it is bad, and how I could improve on it.
All the stuff I'm showing is very preliminary, primarily pencils and one early attempt at inking (and experiments in color) I'm not satisfied with. I'm primarily looking for criticism on panel layout and the inking I did on the stand alone panel. The project is created with eventual print in mind, so the "page" seen here is actually 10 1/2" x 6 7/8". The panels themselves take up a total area of 9" x 6".


Here I'd mainly like feedback on the layout, though criticism of the pencil sketches is welcome as well.


Here I'm looking for feedback on the inking, how it looks, what I should keep, and what might best be dropped. It's not a final version, due to some mistakes I've made, but it's pretty close to what I had in mind.

Thanks in advance =)

[VinnieD]

The pencils look pretty good but you should probably thin your lines as things move further and further away from the front. It's particularly noticeable on that brick wall. While the pattern does a good job of staying consistent the lines are the same thickness all the way back, when they should appear to get smaller as they move away keeping the same ink to white space ratio.

If you're using a brush or brush pens you can accomplish this to some degree by lightening up. You can do this with most felt tip micron style pens too, but for the far away stuff you'll eventually have to switch to a smaller point. Pressure control is the way to keep a consistent line between the two.

the water certainly needs thinner and more wispy lines otherwise it looks like a bunch of snakes.

[KWill]

The pencils look pretty good but you should probably thin your lines as things move further and further away from the front. It's particularly noticeable on that brick wall. While the pattern does a good job of staying consistent the lines are the same thickness all the way back, when they should appear to get smaller as they move away keeping the same ink to white space ratio.

If you're using a brush or brush pens you can accomplish this to some degree by lightening up. You can do this with most felt tip micron style pens too, but for the far away stuff you'll eventually have to switch to a smaller point. Pressure control is the way to keep a consistent line between the two.

the water certainly needs thinner and more wispy lines otherwise it looks like a bunch of snakes.

Thanks for the advice. As to the water though, I intend to color the panel. Do you think that will balance out the thicker lines?

[Td501]

The thicker lines imply that light fades in the distance. Good effect for a sewer. If they were outdoors, you'd want to maintain the black to white ratio. Even once color is applied, there will be a 'darkening effect' if the line thickness is constant with distance.

[KWill]

I don't really intend to use the line work to influence the darkening or lighting. Most of that is going to be color. But thanks anyway =)

[Lance]

Yeah I'm agreein' about inking technique. I like the way you inked the bricks, it helps create an impression of 3d.But try a bolder line around the edges of your foreground characters and thinner lines in the background and the people will stand out more from the environment. Color choices help that too, but I like to get as finished a look in the b&w as possible. Chic Stone was good at this waaaay back in the '60s, check out how the foreground is clear even at this size due to line veriation.