12/24

StarrPolish · Post by **StarrPolish** » Mon Dec 24, 2001 5:14 am

Oi...kind of makes you remember that not everyone has it as good as you.
I wish Brandy'd get out of there.

Mokonapuff · Post by **Mokonapuff** » Mon Dec 24, 2001 6:30 am

Ne...poor Brandy...::gives her more kleenexes and a teddy bear to cry on::

BJ · Post by BJ » Mon Dec 24, 2001 7:26 am

Thanks folks--I didn't mean to bring down everybody's holidays, but it's the only thing I can think of lately: I've got it pretty good, no matter how much I complain, so I'd better start appreciating it.I want everybody to make sure they soak up the good stuff from family, friends or whomever (or whatever) makes you happy.That's an order. <IMG SRC="http://www.keenspace.com/forums/smile.gif"> Take care of yourselves you guys.------------------
Fully unaware that time was a line that the mind could bend...<A HREF="http://www.jobeth.net" TARGET=_blank>.</A>

Dennis K · Post by **Dennis K** » Mon Dec 24, 2001 9:42 am

...
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...
...
...I just got an idea for your christmas present, BJ (A drawing, of course).B(------------------
Dennis K
<A HREF="http://dragonstarcomics.8m.com" TARGET=_blank>Dragonstar Comics</A>
"The first rule about <A HREF="http://fogclub.keenspace.com" TARGET=_blank>FOGClub</A>is, ALWAYS talk about <A HREF="http://fogclub.keenspace.com" TARGET=_blank>FOGClub</A>!" -- Pauly, <A HREF="http://untitledagain.com" TARGET=_blank>Untitled Again</A>

Cannonshop · Post by **Cannonshop** » Mon Dec 24, 2001 10:02 am

If only someone would take her "man" out, say with 180 grains of copper jacketed death at close range...Sigh...
------------------
<A HREF="http://galaxylegend.keenspace.com
"Darker" TARGET=_blank>http://galaxylegend.keenspace.com</A> and more violent, guaranteed."

Appendix Q · Post by **Appendix Q** » Mon Dec 24, 2001 10:14 am

Note to self: Send Brandy a lightsaber for Christmas.

Rann · Post by **Rann** » Mon Dec 24, 2001 12:10 pm

Maybe Brandy's husband will sign up for the army and go off and get bitten by a cobra in Afghanistan or something.

Incidence · Post by **Incidence** » Tue Dec 25, 2001 1:01 am

The problem with this sorta situation as I understand it is that the victim often doesn't want to leave, there isn't anything physically keeping Brandy from just walking out or anything else she just doesn't want to. More often then not the victim has what is called a dependant personality type, basiclly they feel they have to be with someone and they will do whatever it takes to stay with that person even if that means being abused. Untell the person learns how to deal with it the situation isn't going to get better, even if one abuser is removed unless she gets help odds are the person will end up in the same sort of relationship, sometimes to the extent of searching in out.Having said all that I want to see the ^%$^#$*&%$@ get whats coming to him just as much as everyone else.I know a number of your storylines are already planned out BJ but can we have a story about Brandy and this, Please?

Aleoi · Post by **Aleoi** » Tue Dec 25, 2001 2:05 am

*lends Brandy her flamethrower*------------------
There is no problem a flamethrower can't fix.

Gigabeetle · Post by **Gigabeetle** » Tue Dec 25, 2001 4:38 am

GRRRRRRRRRRR!!!!------------------
"We've got a blind date with Destiny..... and it looks like she's ordered the lobster!"
-The Shoveller
(Mystery Men)

Veryinky · Post by **Veryinky** » Tue Dec 25, 2001 11:03 am

I don't get it.Ok, firstly, for the others here, your first reaction is killing? Brandy's guy uses fists on her, so it makes it ok to use a gun on him? That's ethical how exactly?Granted, I collect swords, have an M60 with belt in a glass case in my den, and have been taken martial arts classes since I can remember. But I'm a sworn pacifist, minimum force, toss and sweep instead of punch and kick and all that. Violence should be your last resort, not the first.Seccondly, why can't she simply leave? She's been with that guy for year(s?) now and it's not a new situation. She has plenty of friends to call or acquaintances to impose upon for a couch or a spare room. Consider that leaveing would have the maximum return for the minimum risk and effort it's the best option.Saying that she should kill him is pointless because she can't even leave him. -VeryinkyPs. I've seen something similar in real life over the past few years, where a friend of mine shot her ex husband who used beat her up, it turned out badly. He was crippled while she got arrested, she got cancer and died a year later, he commited suicide on hearing the news.

PolyWitch · Post by **PolyWitch** » Wed Dec 26, 2001 1:08 am

I tend to believe that the less violence the better, myself. As to why she doesn't leave, she believes that she is in control, as she said in her conversation with Melissa. <BLOCKQUOTE>quote:<HR>Originally posted by Incidence:
The problem with this sorta situation as I understand it is that the victim often doesn't want to leave, there isn't anything physically keeping Brandy from just walking out or anything else she just doesn't want to. More often then not the victim has what is called a dependant personality type, basiclly they feel they have to be with someone and they will do whatever it takes to stay with that person even if that means being abused. Untell the person learns how to deal with it the situation isn't going to get better, even if one abuser is removed unless she gets help odds are the person will end up in the same sort of relationship, sometimes to the extent of searching in out.
<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>Umm, Incidence? That smacks of blaming the victim. In actuality, the abuser is generally a very charismatic and manipulative individual, who has managed to convince the abused person that no one else would want him or her, or that the abused person is actually in control of the relationship. Or they have convinced the victim that it *is* all their fault, and if they were "better," it wouldn't happen. Which, I'm afraid, sounds a lot like what you just said. Yes, the victim chooses to stay in the relationship, but often it's because the abuser has carefully hidden any other alternative so they are no longer apparent.In addition, an abusive relationship often has incredible highs to match the lows -- and the abuser can promise the moon and the stars in such a way that their victim believes them. Sometimes it can seem that the highs more than compensate for the lows.But in all cases, it's the fault of the abuser, not the victim. The victim may have healthier choices, but they may not be able to see them. It still isn't their fault.
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--PolyWitch
Well armed pacifist[This message has been edited by PolyWitch (edited 12-26-2001).]

Appendix Q · Post by **Appendix Q** » Wed Dec 26, 2001 6:40 am

Inky, we want to kill him because: (A) we're angry at him, (B) he's beating up Brandy, and (C) killing him would be very therapeutic. <IMG SRC="http://www.keenspace.com/forums/mad.gif">As for why she doesn't leave, read the Family storyline.

StarrPolish · Post by **StarrPolish** » Wed Dec 26, 2001 10:11 am

Hey, inky, I agree with you. Note I said I wanted to get Brandy out of there. I was basically raised in a 'martial arts family' (It's my dad's life, and my sensai is like another dad, or an uncle <IMG SRC="http://www.keenspace.com/forums/wink.gif"> ) and have been taught that I should only punch if it's the last resort.
::shrug:: People's opinions.

Rhakir · Post by **Rhakir** » Thu Dec 27, 2001 3:43 am

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:<HR>Originally posted by PolyWitch:
But in all cases, it's the fault of the abuser, not the victim. The victim may have healthier choices, but they may not be able to see them. It still isn't their fault.<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>As much as I would like to agree, I cannot. Having worked with victims of abuse, and locked away the abusers, I can honestly say that there are times when the "victim" does have a problem. Not always, and your observations on the manipulativeness of abusers is very accurate, but sometimes there is more to it than just that...Too many times when I was a Police Officer, responding to domestic disturbance calls (at least a good 80% of calls we responded to on an average night), the "victim" was unwilling to press charges. This isn't out of fear of retribution, but because they truly do care about the "abuser." Officers have been attacked by "victims" before, because they attempted to arrest the apparent aggressor... These things are indicative of something other than a charismatic, manipulative abuser. I have also seen where the victim readily and willingly goes back to the same partner after being given the opportunity and the means to move on with their lives. Not all go back, but enough do to make one question the situation... And, as mentioned, some seek out other partners to treat them the same way, placing themselves into the same type of situation over and over again.Not to demean the victims, but sometimes there is a psychological problem, a dependence on that type of relationship. This is not placing blame, but rather addressing a different aspect to the problem. To say a victim has no part to share at all is to ignore what could (possibly) really be wrong.Regardless, the victim needs help... *****Rhakir-

Bill_the_Radish · Post by **Bill_the_Radish** » Thu Dec 27, 2001 5:13 am

There's no straight line of black and white in the world and the border gets even less defined when you're talking about abuse. You *can't* generalize something like this because you're talking about the emotions of two people. If you're going to talk, don't make generalizations because it'll never fit and possibly create an argument. Talk about Brandy's situation.As for the violence... ::shrug:: *This* is not reality. This is fandom. For most people, the immediate gut reaction to seeing someone you know in a bad situation is anger. Take away restraints, reality and recriminations and people will seem a *lot* more violent. ::looks down:: Oh look, soapboxes. ^^; I'll get down now.------------------
Bill the Radish ^o.o^v
AKA - The Sweet One
GWGN (girl with guy's name)

RavidelT · Post by **RavidelT** » Sat Dec 29, 2001 4:13 am

Umm i'll feel like an ass in the morning for saying this but whatever. Look it's ok that people wish to place a slug inbetween chet's eyes. They cant. I think on a whole we should look at what BJ is trying to say through this. I know, i'm a writer, or should i say i try. But look at it this way. The work is validated if it makes any one of you sit up and relise that you can do something constructive, not destructive, about families suffering from abuse. Any time reading this, or any other comic, improves your life or the life of another through your actions it's all worth it. That's one of the points of art, is to make life better. Another is to provide a mirror to the real world. If one of you saw the comic and realise that something had been going wrong in your own life then it was worth it. If it made abuse more real to you and you saw it for the terrible thing it is than it was worth it. if by seeing the comic it showed you somehting about the real world then bravo. cuz if you aren't improving the world even a sliver what are you doing? We should all be working together to make this a better placeIf you can help just one person you are making a world of diference. It may sound corny but it's true. Good deeds are like the ripples disney makes them out to be. Life is worth perpetuating, kindness is worth sharing, happieness is a gift worth giving. And if in the end the comic had a part in making you realise that you could make a diference, that you could help someone else, then isn't the world a much better place to live in? If simply because you know that there are people who care. I don't know but I'd like to think that everyone has a voice, the more powerful the voice the more i should be used. And i'm sorry if the AMARICAN superstar musicians can bury their egos long enough to remake a marving gaye song (though what does this say about their creativity)to the effort to make people realise their is too much war, suffering, and torment out there then why can't a (forgive me) simple cartoonist do the same in his own way.

DukeNuke · Post by **DukeNuke** » Sat Dec 29, 2001 11:28 am

Come on people! Cheer up! There's plenty in life to be happy about!Here, have some spub. ::Hands everyone a can of spub::No, it's nothing like Spam, unless you want it to be. <IMG SRC="http://duke170.freewebspace.com/images/duke3.jpg">
Spub Wars: Attack of the Spubs.------------------
Duke. Call me Duke."Even dogs should not be forced to work like dogs!"-Jack from Samurai Jack, Genndy Tartakovsky's newest kick-ass show. <A HREF="http://www.angelfire.com/ego/andthen/" TARGET=_blank>Andthen...Fanfiction</A> Ah. Fanfic Paradise.Duke's wish right now: For a Game Cube and many, many games. Oh, and lots of cash.Duke's Question of the post: Why do people like the overpriced X-Box so much?Shout out: If anyone has any anime-related (doesn't matter which anime) or original fanfics, please send them to <A HREF="mailto:chaotickaoz@hotmail.com">chaotickaoz@hotmail.com</A> so he can put it up on <A HREF="http://www.angelfire.com/ego/andthen/" TARGET=_blank>Andthen...Fanfiction</A>! (If anyone has been to my site, they know what I'm talking about.)