I was planning to write a long drawn out rant yesterday about everything that was ticking me off about it. The capitalism, false patriotism, bias, political BS, obbsession, media coverage. All of it, ranted out of my system yesterday. Right after class.
It didn't happen.
For a very simple reason. I went to class, my teacher held a moment of silence for the first 5 minutes, I made a face at him when he started. When I was walking back, I saw them setting up stuff for everything they had planned to do yesterday. And after I had already decided not to write, I got a call from one of the freshman who just joined anime club. He wanted to know if the event on Samford lawn, a memorial service, was something he was required to attend. He was genuinely concerned, there had been that many people there.
No. But I decided not to rant because, all my complaints, yelling about them won't fix them, the only thing that's likely to change is me pissing some people off. And it wasn't as though the day meant nothing to me. It had been a very rough thing for me a year ago. I had family in various positions of being targets. And my cousin, a pilot, we couldn't locate him for several hours. The day certainly affected me. What really had gotten to me was the commercialization and national obssession of the pat year that I had avoided like a hot skillet.
So I got in from class yesterday and said. I keep complaining how this obssession isn't healthy for individuals or for the country at large. But I'm just obssessing over it in a different way. In anger. And that's not healthy or going to change anything.
So I just let it go. Let it stop getting to me, and let it go. I held my own private remembrance by making a wallpaper using a quikie sketch and photos from before, during and after the event, and put it on my desktop. My own memorial.
And that's all I did.
I decided it was time to stop obssesing in anger or in sadness.
I just let it go.
Safe Journeys All,