Seems every ten minutes I can think of another Simpsons quote/scene I love.
(writing on his college application)Homer: ....it was the most I every threw up and it changed my life forever.
Inspector: Mr Burns I haven't seen so many violations in one plant...
Burns: Oh look some thoughtless indivicual has left thousands and thousands of dollars on this table. Come Smithers lets leave and when we come back hopefully the huge pile of money will be gone *leaves and comes back, money still on table*
Inspector: Mr. Burns I think you're trying to bribe me.
Burns: What's there to think about?! Take it you fool, take it!
Burns: Oh course we wouldn't dream of going on the island without the bait uh that is the bait...thing...beauty the bathing beauty. Yes I covered that up pretty well.
Homer: Well I always believed in the three "R"s Writing TV guide, reading TV guide, and renewing TV guide.
(when Bart was a baby)
Homer: Got your nose.
Bart: Got your wallet.
Bart: If it makes you feel better I think when you die you can come back as anything you want. I'd be a butterfly
Lisa: Why?
Bart: Because no one ever suspects the butterfly MUWHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
Kang: Run, he has a board with a nail in it!
Homer: You heard me I won't be in for the rest of the week......I told you my baby beat me up.....oh that is not the worst excuse I ever thought of.
Homer: Remember when I got caught stealing all those watches from Sears? Well that's nothing cause you have a gambling problem. And remember when I let that escaped criminal in our house cause he was dressed like Santa? Well that's nothing cause you have a gambling problem.