Thinking about Archie
always reminds me of how, in my early college "fan fiction I hope has been burned" period, I wrote a couple things along the lines of "Archie
meets the 'Mirror, Mirror' episode of Star Trek
meets the 'cyberpunk' genre." Mostly because at that point in time, I thought everything could be improved with guns and cyborg stuff.
I'm not sure that's completely changed.
The answer is pretty easy, though: it's Veronica.
Betty, although her last name appears on my drivers' license as well, is a manipulative shrew who merely pretends to be a naive small-town girl. I'm sure she and Jughead ran away together when they were fourteen, but after a day and a half, realized it wasn't going to work out, and came back. Archie doesn't know about this "journey of discovery," and it would probably destroy his friendship with Jughead if he found out at this late date.
Veronica, on the other hand, is a cosmopolitan lover of the arts. She may enjoy the finer things in life, but don't mistake her careerist assertiveness for greed and shallowness. Veronica also has a better stylist than Betty; she probably recommended a plastic surgeon to Betty for the enlargement Betty clearly has gotten; some day she will use this secret against Betty, but not without cause.
Another fun thing about Veronica is that Mr. Lodge is probably a member of the Illuminati. With a name like "Lodge," he has to be at least a Freemason, yes? How do you think he got his wealth?
So I'm voting for Veronica.
Aspartame or Saccharine?
- Akhmed Al-Fayyed