From what I hear of your drawing style I would like that aspect of the comic. Anything that has lovely boys/men in it will catch my eye for a second and third look.
As for the story idea. The fighting, being forced into becoming a secret weapon for thew goverment and being highschool dosen't interest me much in its own right. However the relationships of the characters as they try to deal with this less then lovely life would be interesting. Women (at least the ones I know) like to have deep charaters and the occasional bit of romance. Not sex mind you...but romance. In my humble oppinion, this idea might appeal to women depending on the appeal of the characters.
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Here's a Question.
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Shoe
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I kinda have zombies in one of my strips.
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Shoe
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***SSSSSSHHHHHHHHHRRRRRRRRREEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAKKKKKKKKKKKKKK***********
Double post!
Double post!
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Christina
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Hi!
I'll be happy to give you a pie-less, objective answer from a fellow woman who loves anime and manga.
I'm with one of the other posters: it could go one way and be really cool, or it could go another way and fall into a cliche trap.
As an editor in my last three jobs(let's hear it for layoffs) I was paid to help people express themselves through stories and words. I joke that I have a Reality Stick that I beat stories with, so let's take it to yours. This is not meant to be sarcasm: this is objective criticism from a third party, meant to help improve a story and make it more believable.
Three of these kids all happen to go to the same high school? Let's say there's 30 of these experiment subjects in the world: the likelihood three would be in the same school is very, very slim.
What parents would willingly choose a future for their children as heartless killing machines? Really? Perhaps they were tricked into it by a government health program or something, but I don't buy the idea they up and sold the kids into this.
Dealing with over 100 Japanese folks as part of my current job, I have yet to meet a Shichi or Kyashii, and Hikaru I've only heard as a pop star's name(although it's a big world: maybe these are common names in other parts of Japan than the one I'm in). If those names are not typical and do mean something(off the top of my head one meaning for 'shichi' is 7, and one for 'hikaru' is to glitter or shine), then perhaps you might want to keep them, but there are a lot of cool names that I've run across that are more common names: for women Mika, Akiko, Mami, Yoriko, Yumiko, Yumi, Kyoko, Yuka, Yuko, etc. for men: Tomoaki, Hideki, Hiroyuki, Takashi, Akira, Satoshi, etc.
The government spent probably trillions of dollars on these kiddies and they let them out of their sight for more than a nanosecond a day? Is it realistic to say the government amped the kids up with all sorts of very expensive goodies and then set them free to go to a normal high school?
Ok, I'll put the Reality Stick away now.
This might be a very good read for me: what would make the difference is good characterization, characters that grow and change and interact with each other, not just cardboard cutouts labeled 'smart sensitive one,' 'fiery impatient one' yelling or crying at each other. And that can't be summed up: it has to be experienced over time, where the reader has time to grow attached to the characters.
I'd also like to give a little advice in general about asking for advice: loosen up a little. That grinding sound is your teeth, and I'm sure you want your teeth more than a month from now.
I do a very serious comic, and I understand, but remember, not everyone will see your baby as your baby and treat it as reverently as you do.
For myself, I'm even tempted to have the occasional Super-Chibi Friday! page, where I make fun of my own comic, just to keep myself from getting too serious _about_ it.
Anyway, best of luck with it and email me if you do decide to get it going!
--
christina
I'll be happy to give you a pie-less, objective answer from a fellow woman who loves anime and manga.
I'm with one of the other posters: it could go one way and be really cool, or it could go another way and fall into a cliche trap.
As an editor in my last three jobs(let's hear it for layoffs) I was paid to help people express themselves through stories and words. I joke that I have a Reality Stick that I beat stories with, so let's take it to yours. This is not meant to be sarcasm: this is objective criticism from a third party, meant to help improve a story and make it more believable.
Three of these kids all happen to go to the same high school? Let's say there's 30 of these experiment subjects in the world: the likelihood three would be in the same school is very, very slim.
What parents would willingly choose a future for their children as heartless killing machines? Really? Perhaps they were tricked into it by a government health program or something, but I don't buy the idea they up and sold the kids into this.
Dealing with over 100 Japanese folks as part of my current job, I have yet to meet a Shichi or Kyashii, and Hikaru I've only heard as a pop star's name(although it's a big world: maybe these are common names in other parts of Japan than the one I'm in). If those names are not typical and do mean something(off the top of my head one meaning for 'shichi' is 7, and one for 'hikaru' is to glitter or shine), then perhaps you might want to keep them, but there are a lot of cool names that I've run across that are more common names: for women Mika, Akiko, Mami, Yoriko, Yumiko, Yumi, Kyoko, Yuka, Yuko, etc. for men: Tomoaki, Hideki, Hiroyuki, Takashi, Akira, Satoshi, etc.
The government spent probably trillions of dollars on these kiddies and they let them out of their sight for more than a nanosecond a day? Is it realistic to say the government amped the kids up with all sorts of very expensive goodies and then set them free to go to a normal high school?
Ok, I'll put the Reality Stick away now.
This might be a very good read for me: what would make the difference is good characterization, characters that grow and change and interact with each other, not just cardboard cutouts labeled 'smart sensitive one,' 'fiery impatient one' yelling or crying at each other. And that can't be summed up: it has to be experienced over time, where the reader has time to grow attached to the characters.
I'd also like to give a little advice in general about asking for advice: loosen up a little. That grinding sound is your teeth, and I'm sure you want your teeth more than a month from now.
I do a very serious comic, and I understand, but remember, not everyone will see your baby as your baby and treat it as reverently as you do.
For myself, I'm even tempted to have the occasional Super-Chibi Friday! page, where I make fun of my own comic, just to keep myself from getting too serious _about_ it.
Anyway, best of luck with it and email me if you do decide to get it going!
--
christina
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ZOMBIE USER 8296
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Dark Mistress
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Yup, it's been a while since I hit these boards. Regardless of the comments on this board, good or bad, I've decided to go ahead with the comic. If a high level of negative comments flow in I'll just post it elsewhere!
The first person I would like to address is BunELovecraft.
It's true that the whole genetically altered human thing has been entirely overdone and is indeed rather cliche. But then again in this world what hasn't. One cannot expect to create a 100% original idea anymore. You can always find something else that is like it. However, having a shoujo styled comic out of what is typically shonen material is what is new about it.
As for identifications they won't have barcodes, tattoos, or numbers printed on their skin at all. For the plot there is no reason for it and it wouldn't be necessary. And by no means are these characters as harmless as the My Little Ponies.
Yes. These stories are usually full of darkness and angst. And this one will be also. Just full of dark despair. What sort of an emotional roller coaster would it be if life was nothing but sunshine and boybands? However, I have a corky sense of humor that tends to rear its ugly head in the most unexpect moments and in unexpected ways. And I personally don't care about people trying to email me hateful things about how drab I am. If they're so peppy themselves they'll have no reason to complain about something depressing. Afterall it's a part of life and if they don't like it.. I'd like to know why they were reading it long enough to make valid complaints.
I don't particuarly care about how people feel about my characters either. I'm notorious everywhere I go for creating strange and usually hated characters. (Mostly I'm notorious for creating gay males.) I personally just create characters based on life and what I see. I try to represent everyone as much as possible. I'm not very prejudice nor racist against anyone at all and it usually reflects in my characters that I create. I'll usually put in whatever characters needs to be put in not caring what the audience will think (especially since I'm not getting paid). I'm not a particaruly violent person nor prone to illegal things at all. So usually I have absolutely no problem unless someone's just super insecure with themselves which I don't expect to find here.
But your help was .. well.. helpful.
Next, LAGtheNoggin.
How old would your sister happen to be? Because she sounds young from the description. This isn't exactly aimed at the same audience Sailor Moon would be aimed at. Errr... more like.. girls who are older and have experienced the bitternesses of life. (Lords know I have and all the other girls I've ever met over the age of 15.)
And now Red Lexi.
Thank you! You are the person I was looking for. Your post was very very helpful to me. The style I have does tend towards being pretty. It's a VERY shoujo style. However.. fights aren't my cup of tea to be honest. Character development is where I shine. The fighting against the government is the reason for it all. The actual plot is following the emotional ups and downs of the kids as the try to cope with life, death, and injustice. It is more aimed to give a look into the hearts and souls of these characters. (And I most definitely plan for romance, perhaps even a love triangle. Sex isn't my deal, though.)
Thank you for your post. You really helped out, Red.
mcDuffies, thank you. Very helpful, supportive words! Thank you very much for adding a ray of sunshine to this post!
christina:
True, anything can turn into a cliche piece of crap. However everything that you might find here has some sort of cliche thing to it that could have made it a piece of crap but didn't because of what the artist did with the cliche stuff.
The three are in the same school because two were shipped in. They were PUT in the same school. It would all be explained in the story but to give it away would just ruin it once again.
What heartless parents? Well.. there ARE people out there with heartless parents. Believe me, I know. I've seen some parents in action and I'm a child of a bi-polar alcoholic ex-navy weirdo. There are some truely horrid parents out there.
I refuse to rename my characters because the names are unrealistic. The name Kyashii is the Japanese version of Cathy or Cassie. (Or so I was told by a Japanese woman I am friends with.) Shichi does mean seven. And Hikaru is an actual name that I just happened to like the sound of. The name of the characters has very very little to do with where the plot will go. It really has no what their names are, they HAVE names.
Well.. you're right. Why would they let them go to school? But I suppose that it would be a lot more interesting than continuously drawing some kid in a cell over and over again for the post each day. I'm sure that will REALLY catch the attention of people.
Creativity needs to show through somewhere.
I'm not expecting people to treat it the same way I do. Actually.. I honestly don't go into things expecting anyone to like it.
Chigger.. -_- no. And I don't have to listen to either. I think I'll listen to mcDuffies. Now he's got the right idea over there! And that's probably exactly what I'm gonna do.
<font size=-1>[ This Message was edited by: Dark Mistress on 2002-04-13 16:39 ]</font>
The first person I would like to address is BunELovecraft.
It's true that the whole genetically altered human thing has been entirely overdone and is indeed rather cliche. But then again in this world what hasn't. One cannot expect to create a 100% original idea anymore. You can always find something else that is like it. However, having a shoujo styled comic out of what is typically shonen material is what is new about it.
As for identifications they won't have barcodes, tattoos, or numbers printed on their skin at all. For the plot there is no reason for it and it wouldn't be necessary. And by no means are these characters as harmless as the My Little Ponies.
Yes. These stories are usually full of darkness and angst. And this one will be also. Just full of dark despair. What sort of an emotional roller coaster would it be if life was nothing but sunshine and boybands? However, I have a corky sense of humor that tends to rear its ugly head in the most unexpect moments and in unexpected ways. And I personally don't care about people trying to email me hateful things about how drab I am. If they're so peppy themselves they'll have no reason to complain about something depressing. Afterall it's a part of life and if they don't like it.. I'd like to know why they were reading it long enough to make valid complaints.
I don't particuarly care about how people feel about my characters either. I'm notorious everywhere I go for creating strange and usually hated characters. (Mostly I'm notorious for creating gay males.) I personally just create characters based on life and what I see. I try to represent everyone as much as possible. I'm not very prejudice nor racist against anyone at all and it usually reflects in my characters that I create. I'll usually put in whatever characters needs to be put in not caring what the audience will think (especially since I'm not getting paid). I'm not a particaruly violent person nor prone to illegal things at all. So usually I have absolutely no problem unless someone's just super insecure with themselves which I don't expect to find here.
But your help was .. well.. helpful.
Next, LAGtheNoggin.
How old would your sister happen to be? Because she sounds young from the description. This isn't exactly aimed at the same audience Sailor Moon would be aimed at. Errr... more like.. girls who are older and have experienced the bitternesses of life. (Lords know I have and all the other girls I've ever met over the age of 15.)
And now Red Lexi.
Thank you! You are the person I was looking for. Your post was very very helpful to me. The style I have does tend towards being pretty. It's a VERY shoujo style. However.. fights aren't my cup of tea to be honest. Character development is where I shine. The fighting against the government is the reason for it all. The actual plot is following the emotional ups and downs of the kids as the try to cope with life, death, and injustice. It is more aimed to give a look into the hearts and souls of these characters. (And I most definitely plan for romance, perhaps even a love triangle. Sex isn't my deal, though.)
Thank you for your post. You really helped out, Red.
mcDuffies, thank you. Very helpful, supportive words! Thank you very much for adding a ray of sunshine to this post!
christina:
True, anything can turn into a cliche piece of crap. However everything that you might find here has some sort of cliche thing to it that could have made it a piece of crap but didn't because of what the artist did with the cliche stuff.
The three are in the same school because two were shipped in. They were PUT in the same school. It would all be explained in the story but to give it away would just ruin it once again.
What heartless parents? Well.. there ARE people out there with heartless parents. Believe me, I know. I've seen some parents in action and I'm a child of a bi-polar alcoholic ex-navy weirdo. There are some truely horrid parents out there.
I refuse to rename my characters because the names are unrealistic. The name Kyashii is the Japanese version of Cathy or Cassie. (Or so I was told by a Japanese woman I am friends with.) Shichi does mean seven. And Hikaru is an actual name that I just happened to like the sound of. The name of the characters has very very little to do with where the plot will go. It really has no what their names are, they HAVE names.
Well.. you're right. Why would they let them go to school? But I suppose that it would be a lot more interesting than continuously drawing some kid in a cell over and over again for the post each day. I'm sure that will REALLY catch the attention of people.
Creativity needs to show through somewhere.
I'm not expecting people to treat it the same way I do. Actually.. I honestly don't go into things expecting anyone to like it.
Chigger.. -_- no. And I don't have to listen to either. I think I'll listen to mcDuffies. Now he's got the right idea over there! And that's probably exactly what I'm gonna do.
<font size=-1>[ This Message was edited by: Dark Mistress on 2002-04-13 16:39 ]</font>
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LAGtheNoggin
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Eh, nice guess, she's 15. But she only acts young... It's her way. She's been through a lot herself, two dead friends, drug abbusing friends, drug pushing friends, a friend who also happens to be a prostitute, one who wants to kill them all, another friend's a stripper who managed to get a boob job for free under the NHS (god bless England!) etc etc... It's quite a bunch and frankly she can't be arsed with being serious. Disney, silly comics, Cute Wendy, she giggles like a kid to them...
Meh, horses for courses. I'll definetly give the comic a read though, and I'll pass it on to my sister, see what she says after we get a good picture of your sparkly new comic
Meh, horses for courses. I'll definetly give the comic a read though, and I'll pass it on to my sister, see what she says after we get a good picture of your sparkly new comic
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Sidwood
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just do whatever you want, it's not like you HAVE to care what people think. Youre not getting paid. If people cared about other people's opinions, hilariously campy movies as "Blacula" and "Enter the Dragon" might never have been made.
Mike Ramsey
[comic]
[comic]