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PostPosted: Mon May 28, 2001 4:46 am
by Wimpystuntmen
This week and maybe for a couple weeks after I'll be putting up comics that I've written in the past that would never in a million years be accepted by a newspaper editor but I still think they're funny. The only problem is I've never bothered drawing them up for this reason and due to lack of time have just slapped them together this week (so I'm sorry about the art). <P>On another point, I'm going to submit some stuff to The New Breed (most of which hasn't been shown here) but if anyone has a chance can you go back from the start of my work on this site and tell me if you think any of these drawings would be suitable/acceptable within the new breed - obviously I might need to re-draw some but I'm just after a general opinion of which ones would fit.<P>Thanks.

PostPosted: Mon May 28, 2001 5:48 am
by Yupyop
The earliest I could get to was April 30th. But my favorite of yours was the Stairway To Heaven vs the Elevator To Hell.

PostPosted: Mon May 28, 2001 7:23 am
by Wimpystuntmen
Thanks Mike, yeah that's another that I have to re-draw and have marked as one to try with The New Breed.<P>I've been thinking about it and I'm going to: submit to the new breed every now and then and hopefully get some cash; try to sell individual gags to current syndicated cartoonists; keep writing Elephant tales but only with the view to have it as a web comic; and work on a strip I initially wrote earlier this year.<P>I think there's enough panels out there and it would be tough for me to compete directly especially when I now see my art very critically - I slapped May 28 together and it looks aweful (admittedly I didn't put a huge amount of effort in). As with alot of the work I have in waiting I thought it was funny but it needed much better art to work. <P>So I'm going to experiment with drawing a strip and see if my art works better in that form. There's also stronger character recognition although I did try to do that with Eric.

PostPosted: Wed May 30, 2001 4:16 am
by Yupyop
I like today's strip about Mary and her lamb. I'd add that to the "New Breed" submission.

PostPosted: Wed May 30, 2001 8:31 am
by Wimpystuntmen
What, you seriously think they'd go for that? Food for thought though.

PostPosted: Thu May 31, 2001 5:56 am
by Yupyop
What could it hurt? You send your best stuff. Let the editors edit. They'll let you know if the content is too strong. Then adjust the gag to eliminate any problems.

PostPosted: Fri Jun 01, 2001 7:50 am
by Yupyop
Friday's gag was a little too "101 Uses For a Dead Cat". How about Eric wearing parts of a lion. CAPTION: He was King of the Jungle until Eric sat on him. Now he is great looking accessories.
Too many words? Not funny?

PostPosted: Sat Jun 02, 2001 9:07 am
by Wimpystuntmen
Truth be told I'm not a big fan of cats. I mean, I don't mind them, but I wouldn't have one as a pet. I've written a fair few cat jokes. This gag would have looked better set in one of those cheap department stores -you know, a TV commercial where you also get a free set of steak knives or something.<P>The Lion gag might work since it could be a safari theme Eric being an Elephant and all. As far as too many words go - I'm pretty wordy so that doesn't bother me. I read things about readers of newspapers not wanting too many words in their cartoons but when I read cartoons I don't mind - case in point The Far Side, Close to Home.

PostPosted: Sun Jun 03, 2001 6:25 am
by Throbbin Johnny
A twist to the strip could've been Eric selling his "purrfect Slippers

PostPosted: Mon Jun 04, 2001 5:43 am
by Yupyop
Too many words can overwhelm the art leaving you with a "talking head" comic like CATHY. My favorite comic ever was PEANUTS and my favorite comic in today's papers is JAMES. Both are verbal comics where the art supports the writing, but look how clean and uncluttered the strips look. Neither wastes space with too many words or too much detail in the art.
I try to do that with TELLY. I try to find the fewest words to tell the story. One of the questions I have about TELLY is do I rely too heavily on the artist. Today's (6/4) is about as wordy as I get. Is the dialog in panel 3 too much?
Johnny, is your comic a panel or a strip? IMO, panels, such as the wimp-men here does, can get away with too many words since it can't show movement as well as a strip.
What do you all think of panels with more than one punch line? THAT'S JAKE,for example, often tries to cram too much into his panels, distracting from the main gag.

PostPosted: Tue Jun 05, 2001 5:02 am
by Wimpystuntmen
Thanks for reminding me of James. I do quite like that strip. The art is simple but effective. Gives me some idea's for the art style on the strip I'm working on.<P>I hadn't thought of Telly not being wordy because since there's no drawings there's a lot of words explaining the set up of the panels. But having re-read some of them - its not wordy at all. Having read 4/6/2001 I don't think that's particularly wordy either.<P>I get the feeling that the artist required to draw the environments will have his work cut out. How 'bout giving Bill Watterson a call? <P>"That's Jake" is too busy for me - way too many words coming from too many directions. I'm embarrassed to say I lose interest. Cathy is not something I read though it is in our papers here and I've always been amazed at how many words she can pack into a strip.<P>They, to me, are excessive cases though. I don't think mines near that excessive and as a general rule I try to keep it to a two sentence maximum.

PostPosted: Tue Jun 05, 2001 6:01 am
by Yupyop
Thanks for the comments about "Telly". I think "Telly" has two major problems. I really expect alot out of the poor artist. And I wonder if a reader joining the strip in progress would understand it.
I'm looking forward to seeing that new art style you are working on.
The bellybutton peas joke got me to thinking how important P.O.V. is. Think of same words but different views: close up on Eric's belly, from point of view of the bellybutton, and point of view of the last pea or first pea. Now that really doesn't mean anything, but it reminded me that comics are a visual art. When more shocking revelations occur to me I'll post again <IMG SRC="http://www.keenspace.com/forums/smile.gif">

PostPosted: Fri Jun 22, 2001 6:58 am
by Throbbin Johnny
Hey Refugees!! Sorry Johnny hasn't throbbed here lately. TRYING to spend more time drawing than posting...<P>Mike, Johnny's toon is a strip, and it can be wordy. Johnny wants to create a toon that people will enjoy looking at AND reading. Like you, Johnny works on saying the most with the least...if possible. Johnny's got ONE MORE strip to do(finally...) before sending out submissions. It will be the first submission package since 1998!!! Johnny's been working hard on art, layout, and especially type!! Writings been a strongpoint, and it's definately gotten better!!!<P>Wimpy...Johnny went back through June's toons(har-har), good stuff! The clown in the mine shaft is great!! Also like the pea one. So odd it's a "why didn't I think of that?!" toon. Good luck with your submissions. <P>Johnny will check back more often...<P>"Throbbin' Johnny

PostPosted: Sat Jun 23, 2001 10:43 am
by Wimpystuntmen
Hey thanks for coming back Johnny. We do spend too much time surfing the net than getting down to work though.<P>Most people don't find the pea joke funny. They don't get it. For some reason it just amuses me and has always been one of my favorites. When I began writing Eric it was just him, no clowns, no other characters, no miscellaneous stuff. Not all the gags were meant to be laugh aloud funny but were meant to give the character a heart and soul and give the audience a continuous character to care about. I concede that Elephant Tales won't ever make it to syndication but I'm going to keep him on the internet as we've been through alot together and he deserves to be seen. I've got other things on the horizon - even a cameo of Eric in a strip idea I've written but not drawn. But like you said with your submission - the last one was in 1998. Well I doubt I'll have a submission put together until some time in 2002.<P>Always a stuntman, always wimpy.

PostPosted: Sat Jun 23, 2001 10:44 am
by Wimpystuntmen
Hey thanks for coming back Johnny. We do spend too much time surfing the net than getting down to work though.<P>Most people don't find the pea joke funny. They don't get it. For some reason it just amuses me and has always been one of my favorites. When I began writing Eric it was just him, no clowns, no other characters, no miscellaneous stuff. Not all the gags were meant to be laugh aloud funny but were meant to give the character a heart and soul and give the audience a continuous character to care about. I concede that Elephant Tales won't ever make it to syndication but I'm going to keep him on the internet as we've been through alot together and he deserves to be seen. I've got other things on the horizon - even a cameo of Eric in a strip idea I've written but not drawn. But like you said with your submission - the last one was in 1998. Well I doubt I'll have a submission put together until some time in 2002.<P>Always a stuntman, always wimpy.