Comic Reviews!

[Captain Kool-Aid]

Webcomics have opened a brand new eye for me over the past year or so. I mean, syndicated comics are nice, but when you have people writing their witty thoughts down, in comic form, and posting them on the most uncensored mediums in the world (the internet), it's not only the best time-passer there will ever be, but something special, too. Talent is right here before our eyes.<P>But the whole point is, I've been reading a webcomic called "Exploitation Now". It was advertised as a great artist wasting his talent drawing hot chics and moogle-live perverts. So of course, I checked it out.<P>And it is, belive you me, and I went through the archives, giggling at hentai, drug, and over-all R-rated jokes. It was fun, but it seemed like that was all it was.<P>But the more I read it, I saw an incredible story. There was wonderful writing, touching flashback scenes (done mostly in charcoal), and a huge storyline that was cleverly hidden inside the comic behind all the violence, suggestive themes, and such.<P>If you have the time, I'd like you to read this comic and write a review for it.<P><a href="http://www.exploitationnow.com/">Exploitation Now</a><P><b>Joel Glidden</b>
I can't write, I can't draw, I can't sing, and I can't play guitar. But with a few clever loopholes, I can call myself each of these!!!

[Frodoelf]

ohh! somebody review me!

in the meantime, i will review <a href="http://www.ashfieldonline.com">?</a>.<HR>What if Gary Larson had leprosy, and his arms fell off. He would then have to cope, right? Right. He wwould probably just use the same frame over and over again, adding little things to change stuff, and still make it roaringly funny. This is what ? does.
A comic by Aric McKeown, ? (also known as Ashfield Online) is just about the funniest damn thing I have ever seen. It's hard in the online comic business to be CONSISTANTLY funny, but Aric does it. This is about the only comic strip that has made me laugh out loud. Literally.
THe strip follows (not really follows, i guess) a certain person named Professor Ashfield. The Prof is a mad scientist in every way, with very humorous views on the world, and his crappily drawn world around him.
Aric continues to innovate, by adding flash strips on mondays, and animated strips on fridays. Hopefully this comic will continue for a very long time, or i will have to hurt someone.<P>------------------
----Frodo
<A HREF="http://www.thenecronomicon.net" TARGET=_blank>The Necronomicon</A>--------------more hyphens? yes, please!----------------------ahh.

[Lummox JR]

I have read this comic and will review it.<P><I>Ahem.</I><P>Honestly I can't figure out why I still read Exploitation Now; I guess I'm hooked on what little there is of the story, but although Jordan Kennedy's world domination gig had the potential to be super-cool, it isn't so much. By now it's also been overdramatized, so the humor in Jordan's character has probably been leached out by all that pathos. A 16-year-old supervillain is funny; a 16-year-old who was basically kidnapped as a child, her parents murdered, put through serious brain modifications to enhance her intelligence, and on the run for years... not so funny anymore. Sad, really.<P>My problems with EN are many: When it gets raunchy, it does so usually with little point or humor. The story arcs are at the same time too long and too short; a story that would take maybe 5 minutes on film takes 3 or 4 weeks in comic form, and gets interrupted before it can really take off. In archive form the constant switching of storylines gives it a kind of "Short Attention Span Theatre" vibe. Weirder, the author can't seem to decide whether this should be a funny strip or a serious one, and instead of finding middle ground he alternates between serial adventure and completely bizarre comedy; the tone is inconsistent. The incredible tragedy of Jordan's story is totally out of sync with the off-kilter wacky theme the comic had going in the early archives.<P>And really, I would be remiss if I didn't point out the spelling and grammar. That sort of thing bugs the crap out of me (although, inexplicably, I still read <A HREF="http://glych.keenspace.com" TARGET=_blank>No Stereotypes</A> anyway), and EN is worse than most with it. When you mix professional-looking art with 2nd-grade English, the result seems a little juvenile; when you throw in pointless nudity and various other obscenities simply for their own sake, that impression is hardly softened.<P>Lummox JR<P>------------------
It's the 21st century; where's my flying car?

[Lummox JR]

I shall now submit a review for a different comic.
While voting for Vicious Lies in the Keenspace Top 99 the other day, I discovered on the list something wonderful: <A HREF="http://parthenos.keenspace.com" TARGET=_blank>Parthenos</A>. This strip has been in hiatus since mid-May, but read through the archives anyway.
<I>[Addendum: In an alarmingly serendipitous twist, it seems that Parthenos has gotten back on track just today. Artemis has really stepped in it and doesn't know it yet; while Athena is looking for Odysseus, Artemis has recruited him to help her on the quest she's doing for Athena. I love these plots where the left hand doesn't know what the right hand is doing. -LJR]</I><P>Parthenos is a Greek mythological soap opera taking place just after the Odyssey. I have a deep love for mythology, though less knowledge of the stories of ancient Greece than I could have. Here's the basic run-down:<P>Athena confesses her love for Odysseus, who rejects her advance because of his love for his wife, Penelope. When Athena leaves in tears, he decides he needs to talk things out some more lest she take out her anger on Penelope or Telemachus. Odysseus is sped on his way in disguise by Hermes, who for reasons unknown doesn't deliver Odysseus's letter to Penelope explaining where he's going. So Penelope, when she wakes up, assumes Athena has simply taken Odysseus, and decides that the only way to get her husband back is to challenge and kill Athena.<P>Sound complicated enough? Well you ain't seen nothing yet. Athena starts some sort of quest of her own, and although it's not clear exactly what she wants, her determination can't be questioned. And while Athena is recruiting other gods as allies and exchanging favors left and right, Penelope does the same with surprising success. By the time the archives are finished, half the pantheon is involved in the fracas and it looks to only get weirder. This is pure soap, baby, and I loved every minute of it.<P>Parthenos doesn't break the fourth wall (a technique I find appallingly overused, except in cases like <A HREF="http://oneoverzero.keenspace.com" TARGET=_blank>1/0</A> where it's the premise), but it does introduce some charming anachronisms, like Artemis hunting wild tanks and helicopters. The dialogue gets a little hard to follow in later issues due to the way it's penned, but that's probably my only serious gripe. If you like mythology as much as I do, I think this one's really worth your time.<P>Lummox JR<P>------------------
It's the 21st century; where's my flying car?<p>[This message has been edited by Lummox JR (edited 07-02-2001).]