Okay, so no one's said much about the story lately, but I've been reading through my compilation of it...and I found a few questions to ask. There's quite a lot to try and keep track of here, and I like the complexity and unpredictability of the story. But is Sonic really that big of a jerk?
Does Gemini allow it's controller to control or influence reality in Fursdale? Rico feels like he's being watched, and then there's the floating gun.
Is Rico gaining control of the transition between Fursdale and Knothole? When he was laying down with Keer, he didn't switch, but at the end of the last chapter, he goes to sleep with the intention of going back, and he does. (I peeked on the Artail board.) Is it related to his emotions? He was feeling really worked up over Keer the time that he didn't switch between worlds.
Good stuff, though. I'm wondering about the last part of the chapter, with the alleyway...I can't fit it in yet. I like how the story is developing and focusing onto this one issue...some questions are being cleared up, but others arising.
Good writing, Rico!
*Cracks his knuckles*
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Rico Underwood
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The alleyway is going to be a debut for a new character I made when some bad stuff happened. The reason this is so late.
And good eyes, Rico IS gaining control of the Gemini effect, he just doesn't realize it yet.
The chapter is still going because I haven't hit why its named this yet.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
The flashes came regular as the sunrise, surrounding me. But this time it was different, a feeling of darkness was present, darkness and helplessness. A strange voice echoed quietly 'Take 456'. Still surrounded by the effects of Gemini I found I could talk so I replied, "What?". The voice came again, seemingly talking to itself, "I can't take this anymore, its not worth it." I could hear myself now, but it wasn't me, "What's not?" The voice was increasing more frustrated, "Everything, its over." Again my voice was heard, "Are you sure?" The first voice was heard again as distinct as a church bell and as dark as a morgue, "Yeah." I can't explain it but I knew the owner of the voice... But not really. I saw an alley, I saw the razor. I felt my heart skip a beat as the thoughts hit my brain and the voices and the razor faded away. I tired to yell, to scream not to do what I knew was going to happen but I couldn't move. Was my brain doing this? Was it Gemini? Or was I just going insane.
The event vanished like mist and left me laying broken and blue on a couch in the apartment, back in fursdale. My head felt 2 sizes too small for my brain, a wet washcloth was sitting on it. What had happened when I was crossing over was weighing on my mind. The things I'd felt I saw, I knew them. I knew the alley, it was in fursdale, behind the coffee shop. But it made no sense, none of it did. The more I thought, the more my head hurt.
I finally looked around, Keer was on the floor by the couch asleep. I'd expected to want to stomp on him, but something stopped me. The kangaroorat rolled over to face me, and... tearstains? The fur down from his eyes was still damp from tears. Malice and revenge seemed to wash away, but there was nothing to replace them. My ability to separate myself from the people here had kept me feeling safe. I'd known that if I let myself start caring about anything or anyone here I'd start to lose my grip on reality, I couldn't let that happen. But it was too late, the thought had slipped in. I'd caused this, he was crying because of me, Xe was shot because of me. I felt the stinging guilt from that now more than ever.
Ciaran blinked awake and rubbed his eyes, either to wipe away the sleep or the dried tears I wasn't sure which. He saw me leaning over the side of the couch and rolled to one side trying to avoid the punch that never came. The rodent whirled around to face me still on his knees and breathing heavier. We sat for what seemed like an hour staring each other down, I finally broke the silence by stammering stupidly, "Um... Thanks for the blanket and stuff." God that sounded dumb, Ciaran just sat and blinked a few times.
My brain spun thinking of something to say, but nothing came. Everytime I tried the dull pain spiked making me wince... making me put the cloth back on my skull. My only guess is the kid had seen me wince because he shuffled back over to me and reached up. Instinct, the same instinct that was at fault for most of this, made me jerk back. Trying to correct the situation and tell him that I didn't deserve his help I blurted out, "You've done enough." No sooner had that come out then I knew it was wrong. Dammit why wasn't my brain working. Ciaran lowered his hand and sighed, "I... I'm sorry Rico. I just, I mean, Xe could die..."
"Keer, the only thing you should be sorry about is letting me stay here." I guess what was left of my brain managed to utter something that made sense. Ciaran sat back on his knees with a weird look on his face, "You actually regret something? I musta hit you harder than I thought..." His sarcasam was returning, "But... I'm not sorry about that. I mean, I just should have helped ya find a job and stuff. Then this wouldn't have happened."
My god, he was going to blame himself? Now I knew that first impressions weren't worth anything. Confusion clouded the air, I don't think either of us had any clue what to say. Slowly I slid off the couch unto the floor, putting a hand on Ciaran's shoulder, "Whose fault it is really isn't important. Keer, listen to me..." I preceded to fill him in on the whole truth. Knothole, Robotnik, Gemini, all of it, included the floating gun. I finished saying, "...Whether you believe me or not, you know something isn't right here." He looked thoughtful, he almost looked convinced. I wasn't going to stop to wonder why he was believing it, I needed something else. As the thought came something hard in my coat knocked against my side. Reaching into my coat I felt the hard handle of a gun. Pulling it up I realized it was the sawed-off 12 guage that Toby and Tails had been messing with a few days ago.
Ciaran's ears flattened, "Rico that wasn't in your coat when I put you on the couch." As he spoke I opened the break-action section to see if it was loaded and a rolled piece of paper fell out of the barrel. Setting the gun aside I lifted the paper and skimmed it,
"Rick, this means we found out how to send inanimate objects with Gemini. I'll explain next time I see you."
The chicken scratching was worse than my writing, it had to be Tails'. I simply handed that paper to Ciaran and search my pockets. Tails hadn't completely goofed, he'd packed about a dozen shells in various pockets of my coat and two in the gun's chambers. My rodent companion looked up wide-eyed, "If this is true then... Wait what did you say that robot was again?" I fiddled with the gun checking to make sure it was in working order before answering, "Tails called them 808 units, why? Believe me if that ghost thing was an 808 then it would have killed me before it killed you." Ciaran looked down, "Not if it had a reason to kill me. You remember that invisible guy that Xe told you about? The one Twap talks to?" I nodded, Xe had mentioned something about that. Some guy from another dimension that helped Twap out before and seemed to like messing with events in their lives. "Yeah, I can't remember his name though." Ciaran looked up like he was going to faint, "His name's Bob..." I nodded and shut the gun, wondering what was wrong with the rat. Xe'd said Bob didn't like anyone getting more attention from Twap than he did....
It hit with the force of a tidal wave. Different dimension, invisible, that names '808' 'BOB', The attempt on Ciaran's life. Suddenly I felt sick. My stomach saw the similarities as clear as pale face of my new friend. The ends started tying up like saturday night movie. The police forgetting to search the apartment, the paper reporting Keer as dead, the fakish smiles on all the mobsters faces, it was a nightmare reality and the similarities were the worst kind, lethal ones.
And good eyes, Rico IS gaining control of the Gemini effect, he just doesn't realize it yet.
The chapter is still going because I haven't hit why its named this yet.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
The flashes came regular as the sunrise, surrounding me. But this time it was different, a feeling of darkness was present, darkness and helplessness. A strange voice echoed quietly 'Take 456'. Still surrounded by the effects of Gemini I found I could talk so I replied, "What?". The voice came again, seemingly talking to itself, "I can't take this anymore, its not worth it." I could hear myself now, but it wasn't me, "What's not?" The voice was increasing more frustrated, "Everything, its over." Again my voice was heard, "Are you sure?" The first voice was heard again as distinct as a church bell and as dark as a morgue, "Yeah." I can't explain it but I knew the owner of the voice... But not really. I saw an alley, I saw the razor. I felt my heart skip a beat as the thoughts hit my brain and the voices and the razor faded away. I tired to yell, to scream not to do what I knew was going to happen but I couldn't move. Was my brain doing this? Was it Gemini? Or was I just going insane.
The event vanished like mist and left me laying broken and blue on a couch in the apartment, back in fursdale. My head felt 2 sizes too small for my brain, a wet washcloth was sitting on it. What had happened when I was crossing over was weighing on my mind. The things I'd felt I saw, I knew them. I knew the alley, it was in fursdale, behind the coffee shop. But it made no sense, none of it did. The more I thought, the more my head hurt.
I finally looked around, Keer was on the floor by the couch asleep. I'd expected to want to stomp on him, but something stopped me. The kangaroorat rolled over to face me, and... tearstains? The fur down from his eyes was still damp from tears. Malice and revenge seemed to wash away, but there was nothing to replace them. My ability to separate myself from the people here had kept me feeling safe. I'd known that if I let myself start caring about anything or anyone here I'd start to lose my grip on reality, I couldn't let that happen. But it was too late, the thought had slipped in. I'd caused this, he was crying because of me, Xe was shot because of me. I felt the stinging guilt from that now more than ever.
Ciaran blinked awake and rubbed his eyes, either to wipe away the sleep or the dried tears I wasn't sure which. He saw me leaning over the side of the couch and rolled to one side trying to avoid the punch that never came. The rodent whirled around to face me still on his knees and breathing heavier. We sat for what seemed like an hour staring each other down, I finally broke the silence by stammering stupidly, "Um... Thanks for the blanket and stuff." God that sounded dumb, Ciaran just sat and blinked a few times.
My brain spun thinking of something to say, but nothing came. Everytime I tried the dull pain spiked making me wince... making me put the cloth back on my skull. My only guess is the kid had seen me wince because he shuffled back over to me and reached up. Instinct, the same instinct that was at fault for most of this, made me jerk back. Trying to correct the situation and tell him that I didn't deserve his help I blurted out, "You've done enough." No sooner had that come out then I knew it was wrong. Dammit why wasn't my brain working. Ciaran lowered his hand and sighed, "I... I'm sorry Rico. I just, I mean, Xe could die..."
"Keer, the only thing you should be sorry about is letting me stay here." I guess what was left of my brain managed to utter something that made sense. Ciaran sat back on his knees with a weird look on his face, "You actually regret something? I musta hit you harder than I thought..." His sarcasam was returning, "But... I'm not sorry about that. I mean, I just should have helped ya find a job and stuff. Then this wouldn't have happened."
My god, he was going to blame himself? Now I knew that first impressions weren't worth anything. Confusion clouded the air, I don't think either of us had any clue what to say. Slowly I slid off the couch unto the floor, putting a hand on Ciaran's shoulder, "Whose fault it is really isn't important. Keer, listen to me..." I preceded to fill him in on the whole truth. Knothole, Robotnik, Gemini, all of it, included the floating gun. I finished saying, "...Whether you believe me or not, you know something isn't right here." He looked thoughtful, he almost looked convinced. I wasn't going to stop to wonder why he was believing it, I needed something else. As the thought came something hard in my coat knocked against my side. Reaching into my coat I felt the hard handle of a gun. Pulling it up I realized it was the sawed-off 12 guage that Toby and Tails had been messing with a few days ago.
Ciaran's ears flattened, "Rico that wasn't in your coat when I put you on the couch." As he spoke I opened the break-action section to see if it was loaded and a rolled piece of paper fell out of the barrel. Setting the gun aside I lifted the paper and skimmed it,
"Rick, this means we found out how to send inanimate objects with Gemini. I'll explain next time I see you."
The chicken scratching was worse than my writing, it had to be Tails'. I simply handed that paper to Ciaran and search my pockets. Tails hadn't completely goofed, he'd packed about a dozen shells in various pockets of my coat and two in the gun's chambers. My rodent companion looked up wide-eyed, "If this is true then... Wait what did you say that robot was again?" I fiddled with the gun checking to make sure it was in working order before answering, "Tails called them 808 units, why? Believe me if that ghost thing was an 808 then it would have killed me before it killed you." Ciaran looked down, "Not if it had a reason to kill me. You remember that invisible guy that Xe told you about? The one Twap talks to?" I nodded, Xe had mentioned something about that. Some guy from another dimension that helped Twap out before and seemed to like messing with events in their lives. "Yeah, I can't remember his name though." Ciaran looked up like he was going to faint, "His name's Bob..." I nodded and shut the gun, wondering what was wrong with the rat. Xe'd said Bob didn't like anyone getting more attention from Twap than he did....
It hit with the force of a tidal wave. Different dimension, invisible, that names '808' 'BOB', The attempt on Ciaran's life. Suddenly I felt sick. My stomach saw the similarities as clear as pale face of my new friend. The ends started tying up like saturday night movie. The police forgetting to search the apartment, the paper reporting Keer as dead, the fakish smiles on all the mobsters faces, it was a nightmare reality and the similarities were the worst kind, lethal ones.
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Crash
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NICE tie-in! Very inventive, and it throws another mystery into the mix. You're a devious, crafty one, Mr. Underwood.
*goes away to ponder new clues and blast some tunes*
*goes away to ponder new clues and blast some tunes*
<img ALIGN=left SRC="http://images.deviantart.com/large/indy ... .gif">[b]R. Lee Ermey's Strategy Tip of the Day:[/b]
Don't mess with Sparta. Watch:
Your ass is mine, Socrates!
Get back! Yield! Yield!
The Crash Pad-- It's Too Late For Helmets.
The big question is... Once you've had weasel sticks, can you ever go back?
Don't mess with Sparta. Watch:
Your ass is mine, Socrates!
Get back! Yield! Yield!
The Crash Pad-- It's Too Late For Helmets.
The big question is... Once you've had weasel sticks, can you ever go back?
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Rico Underwood
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heehee... That actually may have raised more questions that it did answers...
Crash, SSHHHH! Don't tell here, if she don't get it I want it to be a surprise... *evil grin* It's only gonna get worse.
Sidenote:
*reads sunday comic* *eye twitch* Oh you... *fist shake* ooohh is just wanna... erg... *goes to do more plot twisting*
<font size=-1>[ This Message was edited by: Rico Underwood on 2002-04-14 14:02 ]</font>
Crash, SSHHHH! Don't tell here, if she don't get it I want it to be a surprise... *evil grin* It's only gonna get worse.
Sidenote:
*reads sunday comic* *eye twitch* Oh you... *fist shake* ooohh is just wanna... erg... *goes to do more plot twisting*
<font size=-1>[ This Message was edited by: Rico Underwood on 2002-04-14 14:02 ]</font>
![http://images.deviantart.com/large/indy ... .gif">[b]R](http://images.deviantart.com/large/indyart/indymisc/My_Mo_Better_Avatar.gif%22%3E%5Bb%5DR){kind=link}
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Rico Underwood
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My command is your wish... I mean, er.... crap 
Author note: Retaliation at last. ^^
Chapter 5: Two of a kind
Keer's face was as pale as I felt. Things had swirled together, making more sense than possible. But leaving more questions than it had answered. It was obvious that Twap's invisible companion was one of Robotnik's latest robots, the 808 unit. Another thing that clicked in my mind was my mental question of why the thugs I'd seen rarely changed facial expressions. But the answer on my mind made no sense. I had seen the thugs bleed, there was no why they could be more robots. Another question unanswered...
I still didn't know why 808 unit that had apparently, and aptly, named itself Bob was trying to kill Ciaran. Or why the police were trying to coverup the attack and make the victims disappear. I shook off the gnawing feeling in my stomach and asked Ciaran that same question, hoping there was a reason.
Keer 'came clean' so to speak about various things, most of which I'd already heard from the few times I'd talked to Xe. The odd thing was that Xe had taken them light heartedly, while Keer was stumbling over every word. His version of the twisted little love triangle between Twap, Xe, and himself was much more melodramatic, it was an oscar caliber preformance.
In all honesty when Xe told me about 'it', it being Keer's overly emotional self I hadn't believed it. But after the past day or so I was changing my mind on the subject. Listening to him explain all that had happened was akin to a soap opera, I'd've laughed if I remembered how. Instead the seriousness of it set in, the look on his face was almost desparation as he finished. He'd explained it all; when he found Xe, how he had started to love the guy, twap's appearance, and stories about a black dragon and Twap saving them with a glowing sword. It sounded crazy, but with all the other unbelieveable things happening it probably was true. The next part cut me like a knife, Xe hadn't said ANYTHING about this one. He explained how Twap had made Xe choose between them, and how he knew that Xe would be better off with Twap. Because she was 'better' than him, how he wasn't a good person, and other things that made my stomach turn. He ended his rant, then shrank back muttering, "Oh god, why the heck did I just do that..."
Something stuck in my mind, something that I had to ask, "Keer, why was Xe living here?" Ciaran sighed, "Dang, I really hoped you were ignoring me...." Grumbling I shook my head and waited for a reply. Seeing I wasn't going to go away he took a breath in, "He's still my friend, but it just can't go any further than that."
Why this was bugging me, I didn't know, but I knew it was, "So what, you just fall down and give in? Why?" The rodent looked away grumbling, "I already told you, Twap's a good person. I'm not, now can we drop it?" That was second time he'd said it and it STILL made no sense. "Keer, what the hell have you been smoking? Good person, bad person... Who is deciding this?"
He stopped, and looked back at me blinking, "Um... I think she called him God." At this point I was begining to wish I'd snapped her neck when I had the chance. "And *she* would be Twap I'm guessing." Keer nodded, almost in confusion adding, "But its not just her... Even my dreams are wrong." I spoke before I could think, "Whaddya mean?" He winced, "Just wrong, lets leave it at that. But not outwardly, just what they imply..."
Thoughts swirled in blinding fury in my brain, I could think of a thousands things I wanted to say but not an approriate way to say ANY of them. Half of me wanted to let him have it, tell him all my thoughts on God and religion. The other half of me wanted to forget it and concentrate of the task at hand. In the end my frustration, morals, and the confused look on Keer's face smashed my ability to keep my big muzzle shut and I let him have it... both barrels.
"Dreams aren't as twisted as one would think. Through all the symbolism and grandure that they lend themselves to, all the ways one dream can be translated, there is ONLY one constant. Dreams have a meaning that is clear, even if that meaning is twisted to another individuals point of view its still the same meaning. That doesn't mean its wrong or bad, or even that is good. Those things are moot points.
Real life is a different beast, a sadistic beast with horns and fangs. A beast with a forked tongue and cat eyes. He speaks in a backwards sounding chant, dark and eerie like one of those old time horror flicks. Latin flowing with evil accuracy from its mouth, piercing our brains like needles. Making us chastise ourselves for nothing. Embedding the thought that anything life doesn't like is evil. When really its life itself thats whispering damnation into your ear. What you see as good is nothing more than life's sick sense of righteousness, a black veil people use to hide their own insecurities, a blood stained gavel they use to judge others and sentence them as they see fit.
Life is what you want it to be, Ciaran. If you shield your eyes and lower your head from what you see as God's holy light, you won't see the three-headed black serpant laughing that pointing an oversized flashlight in your face as he grabs everything you care about and rips them away from you forever. The creature you saw is nothing but one of life's figments that try to make you lie down and take whatever torture it wants to give you."
I blinked and took in a breath. Keer sat quiet for a minute then spoke, "I think thats the most I've ever heard you say." He looked around as if making sure noone was around, "And as crazy as it was... What Twap said makes just as much sense. Personally I think you're both crazy. But... You do make a point... I decide life, not her, not Xe... But, what if I DO think I'm evil."
THAT was a question with an easy answer, "So? We're all evil in some respect, none of us is a saint."
He shook his head, "Twap is... I don't deserve Xe."
No I was getting miffed, "If you say that again I'm going to kick your ass. You deserve as much, if not more than that gun toting she-demon."
Keer's ears shot up, "What the hell? I thought you liked her."
I came this far as wasn't about to draw back now, "Not after what she did. Thats just sadistic."
The rodent cocked his head, "Eh?"
"Snap out of it, she got you hypnotized or something? If you love someone you fight for them. You think life's easy?"
It looked as if I wasn't the only one getting ticked now. Keer was wearing a scowl on his face, "No. But according to you its evil."
By this point I'd lost most of my ability to stay calm, "You ever doubted? Call it what you want, life, satan, god, baphomet, jesus, the name makes no difference bud. It's real and it's sole purpose is to beat you into submission. So its up to you want your response is."
"What did you do?"
"Kicked it in the fuckin gonads. What else?"
Keer's sarcasam bit in again, "Oh thats sounds like a plan. And I suppose it just lay down and bowed to the almighty Rico, eh?"
"Don't be a smartass. You think I wanted this life? My dad raped some girl and I carry that scar everywhere."
Ciaran rolled his eyes at my comment saying, "Uh huh, sure."
I snapped back, "I do... he's almost 5 foot tall and weighs about 70 pounds"
Now the cynicism started the drain out, "You mean, Toby?"
I didn't let up, I bit into him again hard, "You think I'm lieing when I said he was my brother?"
NOW he was starting to get it, simply stammering, "Uh... not now..."
I had told him about my best friend already, but not everything. But in my frustration melted into anger I was blurting out everything. Much like Keer had done not 5 minutes ago, "You think I wanted to have a best friend like Adi? Believe me I'd much rather be friends with some rich ass guy from the city. But most of them are so far corrupted that I'd rather shoot them than have to look at them."
His ears perked up for a second as he spoke, "Whats wrong with Adi?"
Before I could think I'd said it. And I knew I was going the regret it, "Oh please, Keer, are you that dense? He's in love with me, and not the brotherly kind."
I knew my comments had sounded bigoted and mean, and Keer responded by flattening his ears and glaring, "So? You hate him for that?"
Finally I began to regain the ability the think before I spoke. But my ranting had left me only one course... the truth, "No, in fact I love him right back. But that of course means an existance plagued by narrowed minds jerks calling us freaks and trying to have Toby taken away."
Ciaran stood deathly quiet, he's face plastered in a look of sheer disbelief.
I continued, not knowing what else to do. Beside that I could feel my eyes watering, they always did that when I thought about the past, "Exactly. Thats life's revenge. I kicked its hairy balls from here to Mobius, but its revenge is much much worse. I may make my own course in life but I pay for it. Every day, every minute I'm awake, life is punishing me."
For a minute Keer was speechless, but after a minute he stammer out, "T...then why not just take it? I mean why would you want to live like that?"
It was to late to save my disguise of a non-emotional killer. I just started telling everything like it was, "Because I'm nobody's pawn. Not life's, not Twaps, not yours, I'm me. I'm Rico. And I pay for that, but its worth it."
I could tell the shock was starting to lift from the rodent because he answered faster this time, "But... but how do you deal with it?"
I just let my thoughts out as they came, not caring anymore, "There is no way to deal with it. There's no zen, no holy words, no magic omnipitant deity that will make the pain go away. It's all in love, Love is It's one weakness, the one thing it can't take away. As long you have people that love you then life's punishments are less gruesome. But you should know this, man."
He looked baffled, as if still trying to hide it by acting dumb and saying, "I should?"
I snapped at him, I didn't want to, but I did, "Lemme ask you something. Which was less painfull? Working all day and coming home exhausted and alone. Or having Xe there to tell you it's not that bad? To give you a hug and make ya some coffe. And how's it feel now that he's probably already dead?"
The look of helplessness and terror on the kids face was enough to make Robotnik show sympathy. I couldn't believe I'd just said that.
The words came and couldn't stop them, like I was trying to drive him away, "Thats what I thought. Look, I can't make you do what I did. I don't even know if you can. All I can offer you is my help."
The mixture of biting anger and an offer of help left the ball in his court. But in his state all he could was yell and hold back tears, "Oh sure! Like you'll go outta your way to help me!"
I let out and audible growl, snarling, "God dammit, quit being so DAMN negative. Not everyone hates you."
His response hit home, like a knive into my chest, "No... just you."
Nothing came, I couldn't talk. Keer really thought I hated him. I moved my mouth trying to speak and still nothing came. It hurt... badly. Now both of us were fighting to hold in tears, I finally stammered out, "T...thats not true..."
It was as if on cue, he moved over and got in my face snarling, "Prove it."
By now both of us had visible streaks of salty water matted the fur on our faces. Both of us had the same look on our faces, anger fueled by mental pain. Both of us had our hands clamped into fists as tightly as we could. At that moment we were both the same, two of kind.
Author note: Retaliation at last. ^^
Chapter 5: Two of a kind
Keer's face was as pale as I felt. Things had swirled together, making more sense than possible. But leaving more questions than it had answered. It was obvious that Twap's invisible companion was one of Robotnik's latest robots, the 808 unit. Another thing that clicked in my mind was my mental question of why the thugs I'd seen rarely changed facial expressions. But the answer on my mind made no sense. I had seen the thugs bleed, there was no why they could be more robots. Another question unanswered...
I still didn't know why 808 unit that had apparently, and aptly, named itself Bob was trying to kill Ciaran. Or why the police were trying to coverup the attack and make the victims disappear. I shook off the gnawing feeling in my stomach and asked Ciaran that same question, hoping there was a reason.
Keer 'came clean' so to speak about various things, most of which I'd already heard from the few times I'd talked to Xe. The odd thing was that Xe had taken them light heartedly, while Keer was stumbling over every word. His version of the twisted little love triangle between Twap, Xe, and himself was much more melodramatic, it was an oscar caliber preformance.
In all honesty when Xe told me about 'it', it being Keer's overly emotional self I hadn't believed it. But after the past day or so I was changing my mind on the subject. Listening to him explain all that had happened was akin to a soap opera, I'd've laughed if I remembered how. Instead the seriousness of it set in, the look on his face was almost desparation as he finished. He'd explained it all; when he found Xe, how he had started to love the guy, twap's appearance, and stories about a black dragon and Twap saving them with a glowing sword. It sounded crazy, but with all the other unbelieveable things happening it probably was true. The next part cut me like a knife, Xe hadn't said ANYTHING about this one. He explained how Twap had made Xe choose between them, and how he knew that Xe would be better off with Twap. Because she was 'better' than him, how he wasn't a good person, and other things that made my stomach turn. He ended his rant, then shrank back muttering, "Oh god, why the heck did I just do that..."
Something stuck in my mind, something that I had to ask, "Keer, why was Xe living here?" Ciaran sighed, "Dang, I really hoped you were ignoring me...." Grumbling I shook my head and waited for a reply. Seeing I wasn't going to go away he took a breath in, "He's still my friend, but it just can't go any further than that."
Why this was bugging me, I didn't know, but I knew it was, "So what, you just fall down and give in? Why?" The rodent looked away grumbling, "I already told you, Twap's a good person. I'm not, now can we drop it?" That was second time he'd said it and it STILL made no sense. "Keer, what the hell have you been smoking? Good person, bad person... Who is deciding this?"
He stopped, and looked back at me blinking, "Um... I think she called him God." At this point I was begining to wish I'd snapped her neck when I had the chance. "And *she* would be Twap I'm guessing." Keer nodded, almost in confusion adding, "But its not just her... Even my dreams are wrong." I spoke before I could think, "Whaddya mean?" He winced, "Just wrong, lets leave it at that. But not outwardly, just what they imply..."
Thoughts swirled in blinding fury in my brain, I could think of a thousands things I wanted to say but not an approriate way to say ANY of them. Half of me wanted to let him have it, tell him all my thoughts on God and religion. The other half of me wanted to forget it and concentrate of the task at hand. In the end my frustration, morals, and the confused look on Keer's face smashed my ability to keep my big muzzle shut and I let him have it... both barrels.
"Dreams aren't as twisted as one would think. Through all the symbolism and grandure that they lend themselves to, all the ways one dream can be translated, there is ONLY one constant. Dreams have a meaning that is clear, even if that meaning is twisted to another individuals point of view its still the same meaning. That doesn't mean its wrong or bad, or even that is good. Those things are moot points.
Real life is a different beast, a sadistic beast with horns and fangs. A beast with a forked tongue and cat eyes. He speaks in a backwards sounding chant, dark and eerie like one of those old time horror flicks. Latin flowing with evil accuracy from its mouth, piercing our brains like needles. Making us chastise ourselves for nothing. Embedding the thought that anything life doesn't like is evil. When really its life itself thats whispering damnation into your ear. What you see as good is nothing more than life's sick sense of righteousness, a black veil people use to hide their own insecurities, a blood stained gavel they use to judge others and sentence them as they see fit.
Life is what you want it to be, Ciaran. If you shield your eyes and lower your head from what you see as God's holy light, you won't see the three-headed black serpant laughing that pointing an oversized flashlight in your face as he grabs everything you care about and rips them away from you forever. The creature you saw is nothing but one of life's figments that try to make you lie down and take whatever torture it wants to give you."
I blinked and took in a breath. Keer sat quiet for a minute then spoke, "I think thats the most I've ever heard you say." He looked around as if making sure noone was around, "And as crazy as it was... What Twap said makes just as much sense. Personally I think you're both crazy. But... You do make a point... I decide life, not her, not Xe... But, what if I DO think I'm evil."
THAT was a question with an easy answer, "So? We're all evil in some respect, none of us is a saint."
He shook his head, "Twap is... I don't deserve Xe."
No I was getting miffed, "If you say that again I'm going to kick your ass. You deserve as much, if not more than that gun toting she-demon."
Keer's ears shot up, "What the hell? I thought you liked her."
I came this far as wasn't about to draw back now, "Not after what she did. Thats just sadistic."
The rodent cocked his head, "Eh?"
"Snap out of it, she got you hypnotized or something? If you love someone you fight for them. You think life's easy?"
It looked as if I wasn't the only one getting ticked now. Keer was wearing a scowl on his face, "No. But according to you its evil."
By this point I'd lost most of my ability to stay calm, "You ever doubted? Call it what you want, life, satan, god, baphomet, jesus, the name makes no difference bud. It's real and it's sole purpose is to beat you into submission. So its up to you want your response is."
"What did you do?"
"Kicked it in the fuckin gonads. What else?"
Keer's sarcasam bit in again, "Oh thats sounds like a plan. And I suppose it just lay down and bowed to the almighty Rico, eh?"
"Don't be a smartass. You think I wanted this life? My dad raped some girl and I carry that scar everywhere."
Ciaran rolled his eyes at my comment saying, "Uh huh, sure."
I snapped back, "I do... he's almost 5 foot tall and weighs about 70 pounds"
Now the cynicism started the drain out, "You mean, Toby?"
I didn't let up, I bit into him again hard, "You think I'm lieing when I said he was my brother?"
NOW he was starting to get it, simply stammering, "Uh... not now..."
I had told him about my best friend already, but not everything. But in my frustration melted into anger I was blurting out everything. Much like Keer had done not 5 minutes ago, "You think I wanted to have a best friend like Adi? Believe me I'd much rather be friends with some rich ass guy from the city. But most of them are so far corrupted that I'd rather shoot them than have to look at them."
His ears perked up for a second as he spoke, "Whats wrong with Adi?"
Before I could think I'd said it. And I knew I was going the regret it, "Oh please, Keer, are you that dense? He's in love with me, and not the brotherly kind."
I knew my comments had sounded bigoted and mean, and Keer responded by flattening his ears and glaring, "So? You hate him for that?"
Finally I began to regain the ability the think before I spoke. But my ranting had left me only one course... the truth, "No, in fact I love him right back. But that of course means an existance plagued by narrowed minds jerks calling us freaks and trying to have Toby taken away."
Ciaran stood deathly quiet, he's face plastered in a look of sheer disbelief.
I continued, not knowing what else to do. Beside that I could feel my eyes watering, they always did that when I thought about the past, "Exactly. Thats life's revenge. I kicked its hairy balls from here to Mobius, but its revenge is much much worse. I may make my own course in life but I pay for it. Every day, every minute I'm awake, life is punishing me."
For a minute Keer was speechless, but after a minute he stammer out, "T...then why not just take it? I mean why would you want to live like that?"
It was to late to save my disguise of a non-emotional killer. I just started telling everything like it was, "Because I'm nobody's pawn. Not life's, not Twaps, not yours, I'm me. I'm Rico. And I pay for that, but its worth it."
I could tell the shock was starting to lift from the rodent because he answered faster this time, "But... but how do you deal with it?"
I just let my thoughts out as they came, not caring anymore, "There is no way to deal with it. There's no zen, no holy words, no magic omnipitant deity that will make the pain go away. It's all in love, Love is It's one weakness, the one thing it can't take away. As long you have people that love you then life's punishments are less gruesome. But you should know this, man."
He looked baffled, as if still trying to hide it by acting dumb and saying, "I should?"
I snapped at him, I didn't want to, but I did, "Lemme ask you something. Which was less painfull? Working all day and coming home exhausted and alone. Or having Xe there to tell you it's not that bad? To give you a hug and make ya some coffe. And how's it feel now that he's probably already dead?"
The look of helplessness and terror on the kids face was enough to make Robotnik show sympathy. I couldn't believe I'd just said that.
The words came and couldn't stop them, like I was trying to drive him away, "Thats what I thought. Look, I can't make you do what I did. I don't even know if you can. All I can offer you is my help."
The mixture of biting anger and an offer of help left the ball in his court. But in his state all he could was yell and hold back tears, "Oh sure! Like you'll go outta your way to help me!"
I let out and audible growl, snarling, "God dammit, quit being so DAMN negative. Not everyone hates you."
His response hit home, like a knive into my chest, "No... just you."
Nothing came, I couldn't talk. Keer really thought I hated him. I moved my mouth trying to speak and still nothing came. It hurt... badly. Now both of us were fighting to hold in tears, I finally stammered out, "T...thats not true..."
It was as if on cue, he moved over and got in my face snarling, "Prove it."
By now both of us had visible streaks of salty water matted the fur on our faces. Both of us had the same look on our faces, anger fueled by mental pain. Both of us had our hands clamped into fists as tightly as we could. At that moment we were both the same, two of kind.
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Crash
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You're lucky, Rico. I was going to tell the whole thing to Gloria,
but then I realized that I didn't understand it anymore.
Ya lost me somewhere. I gotta go find my place again.
*reads sunday comic, smiles and shakes head* That Twapa is a crafty one, all right! *snickers*
Um, Gloria, see, Rico is, well, he's um, like, there's two worlds, see? And sometimes, but not always, he's in one or the other part of the time, right? And there's some bad guys, who're bad, but not in the way Rico is bad, but even more bad. And I don't think he likes Twapa.
but then I realized that I didn't understand it anymore.
Ya lost me somewhere. I gotta go find my place again.
*reads sunday comic, smiles and shakes head* That Twapa is a crafty one, all right! *snickers*
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Crash
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You're lucky, Rico. I was going to tell the whole thing to Gloria,
but then I realized that I didn't understand it anymore.
Ya lost me somewhere. I gotta go find my place again.
*reads sunday comic, smiles and shakes head* That Twapa is a crafty one, all right! *snickers*
Um, Gloria, see, Rico is, well, he's um, like, there's two worlds, see? And sometimes, but not always, he's in one or the other part of the time, right? And there's some bad guys, who're bad, but not in the way Rico is bad, but even more bad. And I don't think he likes Twapa.
but then I realized that I didn't understand it anymore.
Ya lost me somewhere. I gotta go find my place again.
*reads sunday comic, smiles and shakes head* That Twapa is a crafty one, all right! *snickers*
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TwoDifferentSox
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Quite good work, Mr Underwood.
You wove what I assume to be personal rants it into the story elemts quite well, yep.
I'm wondering how Keer will react to Ricos speech now, the triangle between him, Twap and Xe...
Oh well, but what also interests me is, why Bob (or 808?) wanted to kill Keer, or what Gemini's purpose is and...well, I simply need more chapters to read, eep!
You wove what I assume to be personal rants it into the story elemts quite well, yep.
I'm wondering how Keer will react to Ricos speech now, the triangle between him, Twap and Xe...
Oh well, but what also interests me is, why Bob (or 808?) wanted to kill Keer, or what Gemini's purpose is and...well, I simply need more chapters to read, eep!
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Rico Underwood
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Crash
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You know, if Gloria were going to be really devious, she would make Keer agree with everything you said and then have Twapa wholeheartedly embrace the philosophies of Jean-Paul Sartre, thereby effectively pulling the rug out from under you and making any future rants moot and passe. 
That being said, I hope she doesn't. It would be much, much more entertaining if the two of you continue sniping (good-naturedly, of course!) at each other through your respective mediums. En garde!!
That being said, I hope she doesn't. It would be much, much more entertaining if the two of you continue sniping (good-naturedly, of course!) at each other through your respective mediums. En garde!!
<img ALIGN=left SRC="http://images.deviantart.com/large/indy ... .gif">[b]R. Lee Ermey's Strategy Tip of the Day:[/b]
Don't mess with Sparta. Watch:
Your ass is mine, Socrates!
Get back! Yield! Yield!
The Crash Pad-- It's Too Late For Helmets.
The big question is... Once you've had weasel sticks, can you ever go back?
Don't mess with Sparta. Watch:
Your ass is mine, Socrates!
Get back! Yield! Yield!
The Crash Pad-- It's Too Late For Helmets.
The big question is... Once you've had weasel sticks, can you ever go back?
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Rico Underwood
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No, I understood about Rcio and everything, I was just confused about the whole Bob thing.... Um...I'm still confused about it, but then that's mostly because, in my mind, this is like... I dunno reading a fictional story that somebody else is writing about my life, and that person only knows me from my outward appearance and actions.
Still, I AM enjoying this, if only for the sick satisfaction of seeing somebody else's interperetation of my characters.
Good job, dude.
Still, I AM enjoying this, if only for the sick satisfaction of seeing somebody else's interperetation of my characters.
Good job, dude.
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Rico Underwood
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Crash
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This gives me a great idea, Rico:
<font size=5>REALITY BYTES:</font>
<font size=-1>The Unauthorized Biography Of An Insane Protagonist</font>
Read the book that the entire Untitled forum is ranting over...or in!
So what do you think? You'll need an agent, right?
_________________
"Emo means you don't have a girlfriend. If you have a woman, you CAN'T...BE...EMO!!"
--Mario the WQKE Tech Director
<font size=-1>[ This Message was edited by: Crash on 2002-04-17 13:11 ]</font>
I can see it now: At Barnes and Nobles across the nation, on the stands right inside the front door.On 2002-04-16 15:14, Gloria wrote:
I dunno reading a fictional story that somebody else is writing about my life, and that person only knows me from my outward appearance and actions.
Still, I AM enjoying this, if only for the sick satisfaction of seeing somebody else's interperetation of my characters.
Good job, dude.
<font size=5>REALITY BYTES:</font>
<font size=-1>The Unauthorized Biography Of An Insane Protagonist</font>
Read the book that the entire Untitled forum is ranting over...or in!
- *pokes* You will post more...you will post more...*pokes again* NOWW!!!!
--niquee - heehee... That obvious huh? I've NEVER had this much fun writing a story.
--Rico - ...well, I simply need more chapters to read, eep!
--TwoDifferentSox - But nothing exciting ever happens in Indiana.
--Crash - You are all crazy.
--Simply_da_Best - Rico's got my vote...for President!!
--80b
So what do you think? You'll need an agent, right?
_________________
"Emo means you don't have a girlfriend. If you have a woman, you CAN'T...BE...EMO!!"
--Mario the WQKE Tech Director
<font size=-1>[ This Message was edited by: Crash on 2002-04-17 13:11 ]</font>
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Rico Underwood
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Simply_da_Best
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