Sensuality and the Tao

Ironpaw · Post by **Ironpaw** » Tue Feb 12, 2002 12:27 pm

To be honest, I find few friends within the opposite sex. Not to be said that I don't get along, it's just... Life is too short for pretense and superficiality. That and the fact that I don't have enough in common (interest wise) with the opposite sex to facilitate forcing the issue. I have the most wonderful and close friends! I have no real interest in expanding that circle. I just want to concentrate on keeping the ones I have. Even if I have to nuke the city of Chicago or even shackle their hands and feet with cast iron cuffs and chain them away forever in a dark, musty, underground dungeon away from the slithering mob of choir wenches straining to get their hands on him. Yes. You know who you are.I'm sorry... I've digressed...

Simplicity · Post by **Simplicity** » Wed Feb 13, 2002 7:37 am

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:<HR>Originally posted by Crash:
 I don't think that acting as a gentleman went out of style. There are still thousands, even millions of them out there. However, the very qualities that make a gentleman often serve to make him invisible, overshadowed by the outlandish people that surround him. It takes a certain charisma or charm to be noticed.I don't know if the "macho man" is so much in or out of style as it is the most easily seen manifestation of an increaasingly self-absorbed culture, one places the desires of the individual above their responsibility or duty to society....although we may have reached a turning point in this country, I don't know.Anyway, I don't think being a gentleman can be a style or a fad; it is something that is ingrained in a person, a central part of their character. To become a gentleman (or to stop being one) requires a large effort on a person's part, or a strong outside influence. An interesting thread, nonetheless. Let's keep it going!-Crash <HR></BLOCKQUOTE>Here here Crash! A gentleman is ingrained in a person, a central part of their character.
This whole in out fad style thing was an approach influenced by pop culture and wah! I'm sorry for that. Certainly takes no thought to say something is in or out and in fact it might just degrade the essence of the object of the conversation, turning it into a poll rather than into philosophical debate.Yes! The qualities of gentleman make them invisible! What qualities? And I would think that those qualities would stand out like a beacon of society since you here more often than not, "Chivalry is Dead!" I notice that when someone observes the behavior of a gentleman they're right in there like the Croc Hunter!Woah! Lookit that! He's a beauty! A full grown gentleman...let's get a closer look!I mean they have to point it out. And what of the bitter feelings expressed by some gentlemen who shake their fists in the air at the feminist movement and their firm stance of "Treat me like a capable woman and don't you dare hold the door for me!"Can you truly define gentlemanly behavior because their might be problems their with the current guides that are out.Bring it! I love this! : )

Simplicity · Post by **Simplicity** » Wed Feb 13, 2002 7:54 am

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:<HR>Originally posted by TwoDifferentSox:
Nice speech Mr Elix, and I don't think it's wrong when you got some good rethorical phrases handy for every occosiation. <IMG SRC="http://www.keenspace.com/forums/smile.gif">
I got myself a few in my sleeve, am just waiting for the right time to use them. Think about that, how often when you ask "what are you looking for in a guy?" you get the answer "A macho that's uncareing and as sensitive as a wooden plank."?<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>Certainly not expressed like that but yeah I see your point! And I can see how unattractive that would sound to just about anyone yet there are women who are attracted to "macho's that are uncaring and as sensitive as a wooden plank". Albeit, these women move on once they realize "Oh wait, maybe this wasn't such a great idea after all"But wait! What about the physical? What makes some very physically attractive people jerks! I mean, you would think that since they have looks they would also get positive attention from people who are attracted to them, thus causing happiness within their own inner being and happiness leads to general confidence and good behavior? Why are there all these other factors that complicate such a simple line of events...Attractive ----> Positive Attention ---> positive feelings ---> Wonderful person.The world is not cut and dry like that. I wonder why that is.

Simplicity · Post by **Simplicity** » Wed Feb 13, 2002 7:55 am

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:<HR>Originally posted by TwoDifferentSox:
Nice speech Mr Elix, and I don't think it's wrong when you got some good rethorical phrases handy for every occosiation. <IMG SRC="http://www.keenspace.com/forums/smile.gif">
I got myself a few in my sleeve, am just waiting for the right time to use them. Think about that, how often when you ask "what are you looking for in a guy?" you get the answer "A macho that's uncareing and as sensitive as a wooden plank."?<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>Certainly not expressed like that but yeah I see your point! And I can see how unattractive that would sound to just about anyone yet there are women who are attracted to "macho's that are uncaring and as sensitive as a wooden plank". Albeit, these women move on once they realize "Oh wait, maybe this wasn't such a great idea after all"But wait! What about the physical? What makes some very physically attractive people jerks! I mean, you would think that since they have looks they would also get positive attention from people who are attracted to them, thus causing happiness within their own inner being and happiness leads to general confidence and good behavior? Why are there all these other factors that complicate such a simple line of events...Attractive ----> Positive Attention ---> positive feelings ---> Wonderful person.The world is not cut and dry like that. I wonder why that is.

Simplicity · Post by **Simplicity** » Wed Feb 13, 2002 8:11 am

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:<HR>Originally posted by Elix:
 Having never been in style, I don't know that I'm qualified to answer. <IMG SRC="http://www.keenspace.com/forums/wink.gi ... QUOTE>I found the speech to be quite eloquent and thoughtful and deserving of a large audience including the gay community. I find your "flamers" comment within context of the speech to be sarcastic, not offensive and I think that anyone who considered it to be offensive isn't listening to you for your message, they're listening for the perfect moment to jump in and SCREAM "You're being offensive and you should watch it mista!"

Simplicity · Post by **Simplicity** » Wed Feb 13, 2002 8:26 am

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:<HR>Originally posted by rcawley8:
Too true, TDS. Eh, I seem to have a lot of friends lately. I do nothing to attract them, other than be who I am. They are great people. I have cultivated friendships as well so not everybody I know falls out of the sky. I take everything as it comes, and deal with it. I have avoided most romantic entanglements, dodged or confronted trouble as it needed to be dodged or confronted. Hmmm... Aside from that what else is there to say? Everything seems to move at its own pace... Even preceptions. Wait awhile and eventually even you will be popular <IMG SRC="http://www.keenspace.com/forums/wink.gi ... E>Voila! So by being yourself, real friends were attracted to you? To who you are...to what you do...to just be around you. I could never understand the phrase making friends. Friends are already made. Ya wanna be my friend? What kind of question is that. It's almost like asking ya wanna be my boyfriend or girlfriend? Cheez! I wonder if there is a better way to show you want to be someone's friend... or does it just happen?So wait, rcawley do you ever call anyone your best friend? What's does 'friend' to you?

Rcawley8 · Post by **Rcawley8** » Wed Feb 13, 2002 8:41 am

It is ultimately the individual's tastes and preferences that dictate what one prefers. That is a circular statement I realize, but I am establishing this as something we can agree upon. Trends are created by the opinions of the masses and even if you dont want ot admit it you are judging the masses by what you have indicated in general. The discussion has, if I understand it correctly, turned to what is most desirable in a mate. And the media (crude term but I just woke up) is who is picking whom and all that entails. (think I got my tense right, proably not, meh.) If that is the scenario that we are examining. Then ultimatly we are debating fads.The individual in the crowd is always not noticed, but there will always be someone who will notice this individual and strike up a conversation, that has been my experience. There are venues that cater directly to Male/Female relations, singles bars adn whatnot, but those are on the down swing because of a lack of popularity, or maybe not, I mean I can only tell what is going on in my area, which is not exactly on the pulse of the world but that is what I have observed. No matter what people all seem to find a way to "connect" and everybody seems to be able to find the "right girl" or "right guy". I am afraid that I have not been moved from my original statement, girls like guys, guys like girls, eventually it works out. Or it doesnt, but even that is an optimistic move towards finding a better life mate.--------------------------------------------
Attractive ----> Positive Attention ---> positive feelings ---> Wonderful person.
--------------------------------------------
You are making a leap of logic there. The reasons that a person is the way they are can be for a variety of reasons. It harkens to the nature vs nurture debate and I really dont want to go there. Sorry about my format, I am sleepy and writing in a flow of conciousness adding ideas as they occur to me.

Rcawley8 · Post by **Rcawley8** » Wed Feb 13, 2002 8:54 am

There is indeed a difference between friends and aquaintances, however you are asking my opinion. Friends are people who engage in activities such as hobbies and the like. They are willing to go out on a limb fer ya and you do the same. There always aquintances and those are not friends they are people you know and might hold in high regard. I do a lot of hobbies, the things that interest me. I am not going to speculate on my nature, that would either make me sound insincere or foolish. (I am cool, real cool <IMG SRC="http://www.keenspace.com/forums/smile.gif"> ) I have no "best" friend. I find ranking your friends to both foolish and arrogant. These are people not trophies.As for making a friend, you can cultivate a relationship with anyone, but examine your motives when you do. I have done so before, but it does not always work out. I have maintained friendships through email and the like and I have broken friendships when I felt it was necessary. Sorry if this sounds trite. Alot of experiences sound trite. This has been my experiences. I am not perfect but I try to accept myself and others. I judge and I watch, what else can we do?[This message has been edited by rcawley8 (edited 02-13-2002).][This message has been edited by rcawley8 (edited 02-13-2002).]

Simplicity · Post by **Simplicity** » Wed Feb 13, 2002 10:05 am

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:<HR>Originally posted by rcawley8:
There is indeed a difference between friends and aquaintances, however you are asking my opinion. Friends are people who engage in activities such as hobbies and the like. They are willing to go out on a limb fer ya and you do the same. There always aquintances and those are not friends they are people you know and might hold in high regard. **You are right! Friends are people who engage in similar activities! Or often that is the case because otherwise, how would they discover themselves?** I do a lot of hobbies, the things that interest me. I am not going to speculate on my nature, that would either make me sound insincere or foolish. (I am cool, real cool <IMG SRC="http://www.keenspace.com/forums/smile.gif"> ) **But you are really cool for saying that! : )**I have no "best" friend. I find ranking your friends to both foolish and arrogant. These are people not trophies. **Yes! Do friends really fell good when you call them your best friend? I mean, that is sort of a ranking device that could even cause envy between your good friends and even aquaintances that think you're their good friend! And the last thing you want is the whole envy thing going on with your friends. Friends really are wonderful because they don't do stuff like compete for your attention. They're there when you need them...or they'll try to be and if they can't well...that's life. Sure there's certain things you would expect from a friend but certainly not if their life is out of whack and they need a little time to put it together. Understanding! A great quality of friendship and relationship alike!**As for making a friend, you can cultivate a relationship with anyone, but examine your motives when you do. I have done so before, but it does not always work out. **So think before you leap? What do I really like about this person or am I just doing this to gain something out of that person and once that something goes away I could care less?** 
I have maintained friendships through email and the like and I have broken friendships when I felt it was necessary. 
Sorry if this sounds trite. Alot of experiences sound trite. This has been my experiences. I am not perfect but I try to accept myself and others. I judge and I watch, what else can we do? **Ya know what, it is trite. But that's what it takes sometimes to make people see right?**
La! Enjoy Life!
[This message has been edited by rcawley8 (edited 02-13-2002).][This message has been edited by rcawley8 (edited 02-13-2002).]<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>
[This message has been edited by Simplicity (edited 02-13-2002).]

Crash · Post by **Crash** » Wed Feb 13, 2002 12:41 pm

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:<HR>Originally posted by Simplicity:
The term 'gentleman' seems to have run screaming with the hermits!
..........
So I don't know, what do you think? Macho man out of style, gentleman back in?[/B]<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>I don't think that acting as a gentleman went out of style. There are still thousands, even millions of them out there. However, the very qualities that make a gentleman often serve to make him invisible, overshadowed by the outlandish people that surround him. It takes a certain charisma or charm to be noticed.I don't know if the "macho man" is so much in or out of style as it is the most easily seen manifestation of an increaasingly self-absorbed culture, one places the desires of the individual above their responsibility or duty to society....although we may have reached a turning point in this country, I don't know.Anyway, I don't think being a gentleman can be a style or a fad; it is something that is ingrained in a person, a central part of their character. To become a gentleman (or to stop being one) requires a large effort on a person's part, or a strong outside influence. An interesting thread, nonetheless. Let's keep it going!-Crash ------------------
Love is just a curvature in the space-time continuum.
--Albert Einstein

Niquee · Post by **Niquee** » Tue Feb 19, 2002 11:07 am

Yeah I know. I'm a bit late replying but I've been sick recently so I haven't been able to get online. Don't shoot me.

Anyway...I'm Nikki! *waves paw* *looks around* Hey they changed this place around!

*yawn* Actually I plan on becoming a hermit. I want to live in a little hobbit hole on the side of a hill and write my books and draw my pictures and simply live a perfectly normal life with no connection to real life at all. 'Cept for my computer.

Talk to ya all latas.